In the third edition of the Manning Derby in the hallowed competition of Thursday Premier League South, the Manning 2s, aka the Terrible Twos managed by JT, were undermanned and out-gunned by the Country All-Stars, aka the Thursday Manning top side, trailing on the aggregate by as much as 17 shots after 36 ends, and we were still down by 15 with 12 ends to play across the board.

However, the three rinks demonstrated the random unbreakable spirit of the Terrible Twos, and played with the ferocity of 12 Glenn Maxwells.

Bob Bandy’s rink (Jim ‘Papa Smurf’ Gimble, Greg Hogg and Brett Adams) trailed 13-20 after 15 ends against the Country/Welsh combination of Billy Fraser, Darrel Hudson, Phil ‘Floppy’ Herbert and Nigel Rees, then played 5 superb ends to go from 7 down to lead 23-20 with an end to play, and by the final end, the aggregate was so precarious that they put enough close bowls in to convince Billy not to play his last bowl and take the shot (Held by Nigel), giving Bandy’s crew a 23-21 win, their 3rd rink win from as many games.

I would also note Jim was the designated driver for Billy on the drive back to Quairading, and in these Manning Derbys, Billy has now lost his rink all three times to the 2s (The first Derby in 2022 was decided by Mike Carey’s rink heavily defeating Billy’s).

With one of our starting skips Allan Taylor a late withdrawal for family reasons, Larry ‘Stiffy’ Herbert was promoted to skip, and Ken Jolly (Who was due to play 2nd Division against Rossmoyne) was recalled to the team, also featuring Don Jones and Steve Lambert, and they were given the unenviable task of taking on an in-form A.J. Heal and his team of David Cliff, Trevor ‘TAG’ Gerrard, and Andy Lill, and for the most part A.J’s rink just had too many good bowls for Stiffy’s rink, but after falling behind 9-20 and the rink lost, Larry’s crew picked up 5 shots in the last 4 ends, which could easily have gone against them…

On the 20th End, AJ got the jack but shot it out the back where the top side had no back bowls, leaving them 2 down and allowing Larry to draw into a paddock to make it 3 (Which brought the aggregate back to 1 shot the difference), then on the last end, AJ managed to create enough chaos in the head to ping the jack out the back again when Lambert had shot, only for the jack to land perfectly on Ken’s back bowl, sitting just in front of 2 bowls from TAG.

Thus, they held 1, leaving the aggregate down to the last rink, which just happened to be Terrible Twos manager JT with Mark Potente, Mark Ellis and Wayne Heldt, against the 1s of Joe Angel, Brad Hogg, Paul Smith and Sam Perica.

We were down 5-12 thanks to Sam & Joe’s tactical long ends, plus Brad and Paul’s mind games, and we still trailed 8-13 after 13 ends, but once we got the mat back and started shortening the ends, the four of us managed to reach the head and got a couple of bowls close, and with some superb bowls from all 4 players, we picked up 12 shots in 7 ends to lead 20-14 with an end to play.

So, on the last end of the day and just 1 shot in the aggregate, our closest bowl was a front bowl of mine that was 2 feet short, which stayed as shot until Smithy drew in under the holder, and at that moment, the aggregate was level at 57 apiece.

Going down to the skips, Heldty’s first bowl had the weight but just cut under the holder, Sam couldn’t cut under the short bowls, then with one last chance to try and save the aggregate, Heldty got his line right, but shot through a metre, so it was still tied at 57, and it was down to Sam to win the Manning Derby with the last bowl of the day.

He did win it.

Just not for the team he’d planned on winning it for.

Despite having the chance to bowl the wide hand and comfortably draw in for second shot, or having the chance to play with weight on to any one of four bowls coming in on the narrow hand to pump it in for second shot, Sammy cut under all of them and trajected straight on to my second shot, and in an utter disaster for the 1s, hit the bowl on to the jack, pushing it back and giving us 3.

So from absolutely nowhere, the Manning 2s had won the 3rd Manning Derby 60-56 with 5 points, and that’s what you get with this competitive idiot author running the Terrible Twos – Don’t give up until the last damn bowl.

The aggregate across the 3 rinks during the last 5 ends:

17th End: Manning 1 (54) lead Manning 2 (39) 5-1

18th End: Manning 1 (54) lead Manning 2 (45) 5-1

19th End: Manning 1 (55) lead Manning 2 (50) 4-2

20th End: Manning 2 (56) lead Manning 1 (55) 5-1

21st End: Manning 2 (60) defeat Manning 1 (56) 5-1

And because I may never get the chance to see this again, here is the Premier South ladder after 3 games…. THE TERRIBLE TWOS ARE ON TOP.

Ah, it’ll be a fond memory when we all get demoted to the top side and we end up trying to stave off relegation in March.