The events we’ve had in the last 5 days alone:

St George-Illawarra became the first team in the history of First Grade to score 40 points in a game and lose, as they scored 28 points in 10 minutes to lose 44-40 to Parramatta in one of the more random games ever seen, with 40 points comfortably surpassing the old record of 36, which had been first set by the Adelaide Rams during the Super League year of 1997.

Trent Robinson staged an amazing attack on Elliott Whitehead after his hip-drop tackle on Brandon Smith during Sunday’s Roosters-Raiders game resulted in Smith tearing his ACL and MCL, which also ended Whitehead’s NRL career due to suspension as he prepares to go back to Super League, and all told it was one of the finest attacks by a coach on an opposition player since Ricky Stuart’s weak-gutted dog comment to Jaeman Salmon that got Sticky suspended.

In fact, it was so amazing that Andrew Voss suggested a hypothetical fine and forced apology from the NRL upon Robinson, describing it as a character assassination of Whitehead, but Vossy may want to be careful, because if he makes any more statements like that about Robbo, the only assassination will be the one Uncle Nick orders when Vossy talks too much.

The hilarious part of it all… Brandon Smith said he’s got no bad blood with Whitehead.

Souths tried to pull a swift one on the NRL by getting an independent MD to declare Latrell Mitchell fit to play for the Friday night game against the Roosters, when their own coach Ben Horny had said Latrell wasn’t playing again in 2024, which would then allow Mitchell to serve his 1-game suspension for the white powder video…

However, the NRL called the bluff of the Redfern mob and confirmed Mitchell absolutely wasn’t fit and would have to serve his suspension in 2025, which opens up a big can of worms as they’ve basically postponed a suspension due to a player being injured, which I actually cannot recall happening in recent years, even in the cases of Kelma Tuilagi and Taylan May.

Still, as Andrew Abdo said, it is unique circumstances, given the suspension-worthy incident occurred while Latrell was injured, unlike most acts of wanton stupidity in the NRL.

The Kid Laroi will headline the NRL Grand Final entertainment, as they worked on the basis that while he may support Souths, he isn’t a Queenslander… on another note, the NRL have also announced Raygun will provide the entertainment for the Spoon Bowl on Friday night.

And just on Wednesday morning, James Maloney was abruptly dumped as an assistant coach by the North Queensland Cowboys after being charged with DUI.

What an idiot… He should’ve just snorted a line and had someone film him.

So, I’ve said all of that, and there’s still 9 more games left to go through, and the sad part of this weekend is how many players are playing their last NRL games without realising it.

– What was an interesting game last year has become the most irrelevant Thursday night game of 2024, as the Brisbane Broncos host their old rivals the Melbourne Storm at Suncorp, with the hosts having had their season ended at the hands of the grim reaper Wayne Bennett, and the Storm are just busy gearing up for next week, having already had their photos with the J.J. Giltinan Shield as they let the Reserve Graders keep the Cowboys close last week.

– The 6pm Friday game features the Game of the Year, SPOON BOWL 2024, as the Wests Tigers host Parramatta at a sold-out Campbelltown to decide the Wooden Spoon for 2024, as the Tigers stare down a historic threepeat of spoons, which would see them sit alongside the 2015-17 Newcastle Knights as the only Spoon threepeaters of the NRL era, or they could win 3 consecutive games for the first time since 2018, while the Eels could win their 15th wooden spoon, the most of any active NRL team…

And the grand irony of it all, they could win a 15th spoon at the stadium in which the team with the most spoons (Western Suburbs with 18) used to call home.

It’s what Tommy Raudonikis would’ve wanted.

Of course, Tigers captain Api Korisau played in the Panthers’ Spoon Bowl against the Knights in 2015 (The Panthers won 30-12, and the Eels have history with last round Spoon Bowls… if you go back to 2011, the Eels seemed destined to win the wooden spoon as they took on the 15th-placed Titans on the Gold Coast in Round 26, but the Eels raced out to a 32-0 lead and won 32-12, handing the Titans a maiden wooden spoon… the Eels simply delayed the inevitable and went on to win spoons in 2012 and 2013.

– The post-game act for Spoon Bowl is the Channel 9 Friday night game between foundation rivals South Sydney and the Sydney Roosters, as Souths keep jumping through loopholes with the NRL because they don’t care about Ben Hornby after this week, and a once promising season for the Tricolours was incinerated in an opening half from hell as Sam Walker tore his ACL, Brandon Smith the same, and Victor Radley fractured his scapula to end the trio’s seasons, and to cap it all off, the Raiders held on to win as Luke Keary missed a kick to send the game to golden point, consigning the Roosters to 3rd and a likely trip to Penrith next week.

Someone worked out that’s the fourth time in 5 seasons that the Roosters have had 2 players tear an ACL in the same game… how’s your lollies on that one.

On another note, another ex-Wallaby will officially debut in the NRL.. Mark Nawaqanitawase for Easts, not even 6 weeks after he played Rugby Sevens at the Paris Olympics.

– The first game on the Saturday features 10th-placed St George-Illawara hosting 11th-placed Canberra at Kogarah, who will probably take it easy this week given Sticky doesn’t seem to have a seething hatred of the Dragons like he does with the Panthers and Roosters… Of course, both teams still have a chance of making the finals, it’s a simple case of one of them needing to win and the Knights + Dolphins finishing in a draw, but the Raiders will have to overcome some history, with their last win against the Red V at Kogarah coming back in 2004.

Funnily enough, I made this off comment about Canberra last week… it turned out to be scarily accurate:

“Who the hell knows which Raiders team will turn up, because they could easily get absolutely obliterated by the Roosters’ attack (As they did in Canberra in Round 12), or they could somehow turn it into trench warfare and win by 2 points.”

Final score, 14-12.

– Another monster fixture as Canterbury host North Queensland at Accor Stadium in the ‘Jonathan Thurston Cup’, monster in the sense that the winner will be guaranteed 5th place and a home final next week, and the loser could still finish 6th, but they’ll be at the mercy of the Sea Eagles tomorrow to decide the 6th vs 7th host, although the Berries will be glad to see the back of Manly after the mauling they copped last Friday night, while the Cowboys got a cheap win against the half-strength Storm and still managed to look second rate, as that weakened Storm team was still enough to put 30 points on the Cowboys defence.

– After looking up the creek not even a week ago, the Penrith Panthers are back into 2nd spot and looking okay for a Fourpeat after the Sharks and Roosters cocked up, and they can secure home field by bashing up the Titans at Panthers Stadium on Saturday night, a historical and emotional night as it will be the 650th and last game (The 6th most of any ground) at the original Panthers Stadium before the renovation works begin over the next 2 seasons, and to mark the occasion the venue has been renamed Penrith Park for the week, just as it was when the Panthers entered First Grade in 1967.

It’s also James Fisher-Harris’ 200th game for Penrith, as he enters his last month with The Riff before he crosses back home to New Zealand to play with the New Zealand Warriors next year.

– The first of two vital games on Super Sunday sees the 99th Battle of the Beaches as Manly host Cronulla at Brookvale, a rivalry that for a long time resembled the hammer and the nail as Manly dominated the Sharks, and Brookvale was a ground that was a historical slaughterhouse for Cronulla, as they won only 6 times from 42 games at Fortress Brookvale between 1967 and 2021, but they have won twice from as many visits since 2022 with Craig Fitzgibbon coaching them..

The implications for the game are huge, as Manly can get a home final with a win, assuming one of Canterbury or North Queensland win which would put them in 6th, while the Sharks are just about set for the Top 4 but can still finish 2nd or 3rd with a win, and they only need to avoid losing by a cricket score to drop out of 4th, with only Canterbury a chance of mathematically passing them…

Of course, all of this could’ve been avoided if the Sharks hadn’t wet the bed at home against a Warriors team that had nothing to play for except seeing Shaun Johnson out as a winner, which he decided to do himself in the last minute.

– And the lucky last home & away game for the year has the ultimate implications, as the Newcastle Knights host the Redcliffe Dolphins in the Hunter, with the winner to secure 8th position and the last finals spot for the year, and the loser will probably finish 10th, not even earning the charity consolation of 9th.

The equation is simple – The outright winner secures 8th, and a draw would mean the winner of the Dragons-Raiders game finishes a point ahead…. so fancy that, Wayne Bennett killed off one of his old clubs last week, and now he gets the chance to kill off another, and if he doesn’t this’ll be his last game in charge of the Dolphins before he returns to Souths next year.

And now for the Round 27 tips, here we go…

Round 26 Score = 3/8

Running score after Round 26 = 123/196 (62.7%)

Lock of the Week

I wouldn’t want to be a flying DeLorean around Lang Park tonight…

Because there’s going to be a few lightning strikes in the midst of a STORM: