Another week where I plough through Australia’s sporting problems, as long as I’m not too loud, or else security will evict me.

Jaidyn Stephenson allegedly placed a bet on a Collingwood game

And it was under $50.

I guess he took Nathan Buckley’s advice to “Back yourself” a little too seriously.

In true Collingwood style, he should blame his decision on a dodgy steak, or his dog.

Gillon issues an ‘Apology’ for AFL fans becoming uncomfortable of late

And as of right now, he’s holding a press conference about this hilarious episode, which will effectively be a statement about releasing a statement.

Between Behavioural Awareness Officers parading around Docklands, Jeff Kennett calling the security personnel “New Arrivals” and Chris Judd calling us “Snowflakes” from his Ivory Tower, this really has been one of the dumbest and funniest controversies of recent times.

And it’s given us another classic AFL-related Simpsons moment, this time from Herbatron!

ROYAL ASCOT BEGINS TONIGHT!

Of course, this year marks 10 years since the mighty Sandgroper himself, Dan Morton’s Scenic Blast, flew over to the UK and became the fourth Aussie horse in six years to win the King’s Stand Stakes.

Of course, the King’s Stand is on tonight, and it features the only Aussie horse over the five day carnival- Toby Edmonds’ mare Houtzen, to be ridden by the star from Streaky Bay, Kerrin McEvoy!

Speaking of Kerrin, there’s a good chance he’ll stay in the UK up to the July meeting at Newmarket, due to an injury to Godolphin’s stable rider William Buick.

The Ball Circus is coming to the NBL!

In another big recruiting coup for the NBL, 17-year-old Lamelo Ball, a projected NBA lotto pick, has decided against playing College ball, and has committed to playing for the Illawarra Hawks next season!

It’s slightly bigger than the RJ Hampton to the Breakers announcement, for one simple reason… his family.

Lamelo is the son of Lavar Ball, the classic shit talking sports dad, and he’s the younger brother of Lonzo Ball, due to be traded from the Lakers to the New Orleans Pelicans for Anthony Davis.

‘They’ say Lamelo has more upside than Lonzo, so hopefully this goes alright for him!

Another Kev Walters One-Liner

The Maroons hit the ground in Perth yesterday, and during Kevin Walters’ press conference, he was asked if the team had any concerns playing on the Optus Stadium concrete surface.

“No, we’ll be fine. We’d play in the desert.“

“This is Origin. Our boys will go anywhere to put that jersey on and represent their state really proud.”

Given the state that the Lang Park surface was in when it re-opened, the desert would be a huge advantage for Queensland.

The Latrell Selection Episode

So last night on the National Nine News, some more light was shed on this whole ‘Latrell Getting The Arse’ business, when his mum Patricia issued a statement about the family issues faced by Latrell of late, ranging from deaths of two aunties and a cousin, to his brother facing court on assault charges.

Could it be that Freddie (And Trent Robinson in Round 11) dropped Latrell, knowing what was going on, kept the matter private to the press, and took all the bullets to allow him to deal with it?

We’ll probably have to sit back and find out.

The New South Wales Navy Blues

This is what the Blues will be wearing on Sunday evening.

It’s harder to guess what’s more craptacular- The jersey, or the team.

Could you imagine the Maroons wearing an alternate strip, of say, black?

Exactly.

So if you want to see a New South Wales team wearing Sky Blue this week…

Then the annual Women’s State of Origin game is on Friday night at North Sydney Oval!

The Fed Cup Final Host is… PERTH!

Between getting an Origin game, a Bledisloe match, a Day/Night Test and this piece of news, everything’s coming up Sandgroper.

Tennis Australia confirmed the Final against France will be at Perth Arena (RAC Arena) on November 9-10, the first time Perth has hosted a Fed Cup tie since 2009, when the State Tennis Centre at Burswood hosted Group I of the Asia/Oceania Zone.

I love it, because it’s a nice little filler for the void left by the Hopman Cup.

Miss you already.

And… Nic Nat’s Back

Nic Naitanui is due to play his first game since his second ACL tear in Round 17 of last year, and he’ll line-up West Coast’s WAFL team against East Freo this Saturday.

The Eagles are hoping to get him back into the AFL side for Round 15 against Hawthorn at the MCG.

Poor Michael Walters, plays the best game of his career, and he gets bumped off the back page of The West in the space of two days.