AFL

Tuesday Tithbits: 11th February

I hope that sign makes an appearance at the NRL Nines this weekend.

It could be the first time an entire AFL club’s fanbase gets Vietnam flashbacks from watching another code altogether.


Apparently this is some kind of anniversary for me

Turns out it was the 8th of February that I registered the name.

And as for good blogging, that’s definitely up for debate the more you go through my archive.


The Perth Nines is this weekend

And while several teams load up with the big guns, plenty of retired stalwarts are coming back – Flash Gordon for the Titans, Andrew Ryan for the Doggies, Corey Parker for the Broncos, Kurt Gidley for the Knights, Pat Richards for Wests, but probably the strangest former great we’ll see is former Sydney Swans hero Nick Davis running out for Easts (Due to most of the team being in England for the World Club Challenge).

That’s correct.

Nick “Single-Handidly Saved The Sydney Swans” 2005 Premiership’ Davis.

People often forget how utterly crap this game was until the 4th Quarter

I DON’T BELIEVE IT.

I SEE IT, BUT I DON’T BELIEVE IT.

Of course, Nick isn’t a stranger to the 13-man game – He did play league as a junior (Before Collingwood drafted him), and he’s the Roosters kicking coach.


Josh Morris trying to join Brett at the Roosters

Thank goodness that move was scuppered at once by Cronulla – If Josh had got his way and moved to Bondi, the Chooks would’ve been able to activate the telepathic twin bonus abilities that come from holding both Morris brothers in their deck.


How to routinely destroy your credibility – Starring Champion Data

Here’s their latest work of fiction – The 2020 list ratings.

Source: Twitter

So let me get this straight – Geelong finish 2019 as the clear No.1 for Points Conceded, and their defence is ranked 16th, West Coast’s defence (With Jeremy McGovern and Shannon Hurn) is only 13th, GWS’ midfield has more depth the Mariana Trench and it’s only good for 12th, meanwhile Brisbane finished 2019 as the No.1 scoring team…. and their forward line is ranked 17th.

And this is their supposed evaluation method.

Considering they had Melbourne ranked as the No.1 overall list ahead of 2019 (On the back of recruiting Natalie Portman), and Adelaide 2nd, those evaluations make complete sense.

In summary, to quote Bill Belichick, Stats are for losers, final scores are for winners.


Major change for the Women’s T20 World Cup

Bloody brilliant – The ICC are finally taking no-ball (Which I assume would be at least front foot) decisions away from the on-field umpires, and leaving it totally to the TV umpire.

Twitter link

If this decision had been made months earlier, Pakistan may very well have conceded 700 runs in extras during their tour here last year.

A decision years in the waiting – I’d say the biggest reason for the delay in finally getting there was the fact that you need (At a minimum) 4 cameras, which would obviously cost a fair few sheckles to operate.

And we all know how shockingly tight in the purse strings every major sporting governing body is.


The Australian Cricket Awards

I assume England had a good laugh at Davey Warner winning the Allan Border Medal after his Ashes performances.

It was funny, but it’s still not as funny as old Lizzy handing Paul Collingwood an MBE for playing 1 Test in an Ashes series – And scoring a grand total of 7 runs.

Warney definitely found it funny.

My big takeaway from last night was that the Batriachy of men’s cricket is back in full swing, with Warner winning the Captain Grumpy and the T20I POTY (By a street), Aaron Finch beating out Mitch Starc for ODI POTY, and Marnus Labradoodle winning Test POTY, leaving the world’s best red ball bowler Pat Cummins to be consoled with the Swooniest Player Award that I made up.

The voting on the major medal was bloody tight – Warner won with 194 votes, Steve Smith on 193, and defending winner Cummins on 185…. Despite arguably being better than them both in 2019.

In the end, Warner performed that well across all 3 formats (His World Cup was better than Smith’s) that he was able to wear the Ashes calamity like 20 shotgun rounds to the chest and still get recognised.

Elsewhere, Shaun Marsh was an easy pick for Men’s Domestic Player Of The Year, and probably will be until he bothers to retire, and in a rare win for bowlers, Wes Agar won the Bradman Young Cricketer Award, probably because he was the only one of the 3 nominees (Cam Green & Josh Philippe) to turn up to the ceremony.

Actually, that pick does make sense, considering Big Wes was the only player in the Top 10 wicket takers for the Marsh Cup (6th), the Big Bash (8th), and he’s currently 3rd in the Sheffield Shield.

It was also nice of Cricket Australia to honour Alister McDermott’s dad Craig with induction into the Hall of Game, alongside 3-time Women’s World Cup winning seamer Sharon Tredrea, who also doubles as the aunty of Warren.

Apparently Tredders is asking for more details.

I did notice in his speech that Craig thanked all of his kids (Namely son Ben) – Except for Alister.

Obviously he only recognises his offspring who managed to play for Australia.

On the women’s side of the equation, Renegades all-rounder Tayla Vlaeminck won the Betty Wilson Young Cricketer, her Renegades teammate Molly Strano was named Domestic POTY for her WNCL and WBBL performances, and Alyssa Healy won both the ‘major’ minor awards (ODI and T20I POTY), but she couldn’t claim the Belinda Clark Award.

That went to Ellyse Perry for the 3rd time – Coincidentally, all of her wins (2016, ’18) have been after Ashes series (Which should tell you something), with her dominant performance in all 3 formats in England seemingly edging out Healy’s cumulative efforts in white ball cricket.

Isn’t it funny how the Ashes didn’t seem to count for Jacques in the AB voting, but pretty much decided the Belinda Clark voting.

RIFT CONFIRMED.


Return of the Sheffield Shield

With the Big Bash finally mercy killed, the second half of the Shield season returns Friday, and New South Wales get the chance to beat up the Victorians at the SCG for the second time in a week, South Australia and WA play in Adelaide, and Queensland play Tassie at Wolloongabba.

It appears the big shock is former Australian opener Matty Renshaw, after some 28 Shield innings without a century, getting flicked by Queensland for Bryce Street, an early indication that Cheeks might be concluding his time at The Gabba.

Those green decks did their job.


Another classic case of stupidity

The Andrew Symonds ad for AHM health insurance (Which has made consistent appearances during the BBL) was pulled by Ad Standards after a couple of Helen Lovejoys cracked the shits with it.

This was a quote from Mumbrella

Were these people born with sticks up their arses, or did their parents ask the doctors to do it afterwards?

The ad was a nod to that classic moment of Roy decking that streaker at the Gabba in 2008.

After that, I can see why it was pulled – The ad was clearly offensive to the streaker community.


Lisa Alexander departing the Diamonds

More accurately, she got the unofficial lemon and sars, with the board not resigning her contract.

Only winning 81% of games, losing a Gold Medal match to England by a last second goal, and then losing a World Cup Final by a goal to the Mutton Munchers is clearly below the standard required for an Australian Netball.

On the bright side, she’s got a great career ahead as a Raelene Castle impersonator, if she once again dyes her hair black.

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