Tuesday Tithbits: 24th March

I’m thoroughly disappointed that Peter V’Landys and Todd Greenberg didn’t explore other locations besides Gladstone to relocate everyone, before they ultimately conceded they could fight the good fight no longer.

For example, The Moon – It’d still have a better atmosphere than a Titans home game.

Alternatively, the Arctic Circle or Antarctica – Thanks to climate change, they’re more habitable and warmer than Canberra.

Before I carry on, if you’re wondering where this whole ‘Rugbaleeg’ thing I’ve cottoned on to started, it was Peter’s press conference from two Sundays ago, when the league announced the original playing behind closed doors decision.

He’s barely been the head of the ARL Commission for 6 months and he’s already giving me jokes that I can run into the ground through these tough times.

Peter, you’ve got my support.

I’ve ticked past 400 consecutive days of posting

If you think I was insane before this all started… check back in June.

The only live game of league football broadcast in the world yesterday

Was Newcastle vs Melbourne City.

What a brilliant way for people to fill in a lockdown – Watching the majesty of the A-League, full of moments like this:

And winning goals like this from Steve Ugarkovic.

But, even the A-League couldn’t hijack the emergency sports channels for 18 hours a day for the next 6 months, and they joined the rest of the world in shutting down, leaving Australia without any major professional sports for at least 2 months.

I’ve looked to see which domestic football leagues are still going, and apparently these are the examples:

Burma, Belarus, Burundi.

The first 3 countries you think of when it comes to beacons of human rights.

AFL players pilfering gym equipment ahead of the lockout

This would have to be the weirdest Mad Monday I’ve ever seen.

And we all lived through St Kilda lighting a dwarf on fire.

Peter V’landys on the NRL shutdown

“Rugby league will survive in some way. I can’t guarantee it will be in the same way it is at the moment. No one knows. No one knows how long this pandemic is going to last.”

I believe Peter is correct – It will return as….

The NR.

The National Rugbaleeg.

Assessing the cases for clubs/teams to save as we run out of Financial Intensive Care beds.

If we thought the Super League could destroy the fabric of Australian rugby league, imagine what a virus worse than News Limited could achieve.

Thus, we’ll have to go through which clubs will be worth saving when times get desperate.

Brisbane – Hahahahahaha, they’re absolutely fine.

North Queensland – New stadium and the QLD government willing to provide some muscle.

Melbourne – Like Ponyboy, they’re golden.

Easts – Uncle Nick could buy the bloody club if shit hits the fan.

Souths – They’ve perfected cheating death… And Russell Crowe has his Hollywood connections.

Penrith – Big tick thanks to the Leagues Club

Parramatta – Bankwest Stadium is in play, they’re as good as Blue & Gold.

Canterbury – Bound to have several bullets sent their way, it is Bankstown.

St George-Illawarra – The joint venture has run it’s course, just officially rename them St Merge and get it over with.

Cronulla – Ironically, renovating the Leagues Club and Shark Park will probably buy them a couple of years

Manly – I hear North Sydney are going alright, why don’t we merge the two clubs and name the new team the Northern Eagles?

Canberra – The Saxons are currently sharpening their swords for battle against the Raiders.

Newcastle – Who the hell’s going to replace them, the Hunter Mariners?

Auckland Warriors – We’ll find out if the NRL are stupid enough to kill off their Kiwi TV money – Based on history, you’d say yes.

Gold Coast – Move them to Bangkok and call them the Thaitans (100% stole that joke)

Wests Tigers – Balmain basically have no involvement in the merged club anymore, I say it’s abo ut time we fire up the Western Suburbs Magpies 2.0.

The future of Australian racing

Even as our friends across the ditch have been forced to close down the racing industry, over here, despite all the borders between the states being closed down, and despite the New South Wales Trots being suspended due to a COVID-19 scare, Racing Victoria have said they’ll keep going (The economic hit being catastrophic), and Racing NSW will almost certainly keep going with V’Landys running the show, and so will basically every other state.

For as long as they can.

Of course, the border shutdowns mean that Victorian jockeys and trainers who didn’t escape across the Murray before yesterday evening won’t feature in the upcoming Championships.

I actually think racing is in a pretty good spot to handle a potential industry-wide shutdown, especially in New South Wales, given V’Landys was the one steering the ship through the EI outbreak of 2007-08, which crippled the NSW Spring Carnival and the participants, and almost ruined the Melbourne Spring, given the Japanese horses couldn’t make it to Australia, and the northern horses couldn’t travel south.

Still, thanks to Peter’s apparent shrewd negotiating, Racing NSW was able to obtain a $235m compensation from the Federal Government to help out all areas of the great game, and things picked up again.

I imagine Peter’s currently preparing a similar line of attack to keep the Rugbaleeg afloat.

Australia not going to Tokyo 2020

First of all, I commend the AOC for joining Canada & New Zealand in declaring they won’t go, but I’d also like to say what a move from the ABC months ago, to not buy the live radio broadcast rights for the first time in 2 generations.

Can’t do any live radio broadcasts of the 2020 Olympics…. If there are no 2020 Olympics.

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