AFL

Tuesday Tithbits: 8th December

Well assorted shareholders, another week of December ticks by and wouldn’t you believe it, today marks 40 years since John Lennon was murdered outside of the Dakota in New York.

Funnily enough, most people in the US and A found out what happened via Howard Cosell’s dulcet tones on Monday Night Football, right as the New England Patriots were about to attempt a last second game-winning field goal against the Miami Dolphins… Which ended up being blocked as the Dolphins won in Overtime.

So for no reason at all, to mark a somber day in global music history, here’s the only ‘Xmas’ song by John Lennon, With Yoko Ono the Plastic Ono Band in tow:

So you have Lennon singing a Christmas protest song, and Paul McCartney’s Wonderful Christmastime is apparently about practicing witchcraft until someone finds out.

The Beatles may have enjoyed the happy tobacco a bit too much.


A special edition of Manning Twilight Bowls will be coming up TOMORROW

Instead of the usual Jack Attack/Bowls Premier League format, which will be back on February 3, Half Price has put together a trial night on Wednesday night for the more traditional format of Triples bowls, which I’ll somehow be playing in.

It’s fairly simple stuff – No powerplays, 11 ends, 2 bowls per bowler IN ORDER, and highest score wins.

ou’ll probably hear about sometime on Thursday.


More Skullduggery from Kerry O’Keefe

That’s the kind of leave the British public can only dream of.


It’s hard to believe this will be the 10th season of the Big Bash League

You know, I can still remember going to the first game the Scorchers officially played, against the Hobart Hurricanes at the WACA about a week before Christmas 2011.

A couple of things happened – The Furnace wasn’t quite The Furnace yet, the Hurricanes won easily defending a modest 140, George Bradley Hogg was a bit rusty out of retirement at age 40, Michael Hussey got run out going for a suicidal second run, and I can definitely recall them playing Good Old Collingwood Forever over the PA when Paul Collingwood walked out to bat, which got a classic Perth boo, as Paul promptly hit 4 off 13.

I reckon that game kicked off the great tradition of the Scorchers losing their first game of the season, then somehow always winning enough games to make the Semi Finals, which worked out well on at least 2 occasions.

I’m still dirty about one particular game I couldn’t make it to – The game where the burly cult hero Craig Simmons, who was playing district cricket and working as an apprentice line-worker for Western Power, having scored 17 runs in 3 matches, somehow hit the fastest BBL century in history – 101 off 39 balls… A record he still holds.

Change my mind, that is still the most randomly brilliant Big Bash innings ever, and there’s been shitloads of them.


Breakdancing at the 2024 Olympic Games

Surely this is the perfect chance for Jonah Takalua to come out of retirement and represent Tonga:


One of the things I’ve learned about the Wallabies this Tri Nations is that they love creating art

Because they seem to be drawing a lot.


The AFL Draft starts tomorrow

While Jamarra Ugle-Hagan and Logan McDonald will probably go Top 2, as per usual, I’m on the lookout for some unique names (Sadly, Derek Eggmolesse-Smith got delisted), and I think even with such an interrupted season for the aspiring draftees, we’ve got some real characters about to find new homes.

‘John’ Denver Grainger-Barras:

I imagine Denver will be asking the Swans to take him home to a place he belongs.

‘Great Barrier’ Reef McInnes:

And Australian Crawl’s favourite, Errol Gulden:

We’d give anything just to be like you, Errol.


Hawthorn’s new home guernsey, now with the dreaded SIDE STRIPES

Also known as ‘Brown and Gold Generic Adidas Template That I’ll Inevitably Purchase’

It probably isn’t just me, but the Hawk looks a bit awkwardly placed on the Guernsey, which seems intentional, based on the statement about wearing the logo “On our heart”.

If the research is correct, the last time a Hawthorn home guernsey had side stripes was 1974, obviously noteworthy as it was the final season before colour TV arrived in Australia, after which the Hawks ditched the white number panel (Which came back between 2006-12) and changed the back to gold with brown numbers as part of the wider change by clubs to brighter playing colours.

The most notable change being the ditching of black shorts for home teams.

Just another day in the Northern Territory

Many people noticed those two blokes having a Donnybrook at the Alice Springs races on Sunday, while Ashai Bearing won Race 4.

If you ask me, that’s the actions of two dickhead who left at least one roughie out of the First 4 and missed out on a share of four grand.


Appropriate advertising from Formula 1 while Charles LeClerc put himself and Max Verstappen out of the race on Lap 1

It works, because Ferrari have neither power or control.


So Sam Kerr injured herself celebrating a hat-trick for Chelsea

At least she didn’t do this:


I think Scott Brunton has a good chance of winning Race 8 at Launceston on Saturday

I mean, he’s only got 7 out of the 8 runners:


Wild scenes in Race 4 at Ararat

So if you check it out on the surface without looking at the replay, $101 pop Abraxos ($126 with some oddsmakers) managed to win the race like he was $2.50 with a barnstorming run, but it turned out Alan Hanrahan hadn’t struck a golden nugget today.

At the jump, the barriers opened for only half of the 10-horse field (Including Abraxos, who settled back anyway), giving them a huge advantage, while the favourite Creme De La Bomme was one of the inconvenienced runners and had to settle for 2nd place.

Given half the field had been denied a fair start, under sections AR204 & AR205 in the Australian Rules of Racing, the stewards could’ve declared the 5 horses late scratchings, which would’ve dropped a hand grenade on the final dividends, but with so many horses being affected (50% of the field) and it directly deciding the result, the stewards ultimately declared a no-race.

Poor old Alan Hanrahan – Backed his own winning horse at triple figures after finally getting a run in a maiden, and all he gets is a refund from the TAB in place of a winners’ cheque.


Brandon ‘The Hectic Cheese’ Smith getting an early release from the Melbourne Storm for 2022

So does this mean at least 14 NRL teams are going Cheese Shopping like the Monty Python sketch?

“And pray, what IS the most popular cheese ’round these parts?”

“Hectic Cheese, sir.”

“….I see.”

“Yes sir, he’s quite staggeringly popular in the manusquire!”

“IS he.”

“Yes sir, he’s our number one seller!”


Bravo to Max Duffy on his fine College Football career

For those of you who missed it, the son of the esteemed John ‘Duff’ Duffy finished his three years with the University of Kentucky this past weekend, which included a Wildcats win in the 2019 Citrus Bowl and 12th in the final AP Poll (Their best season in a generation), individually taking out the 2019 Ray Guy Award as the best punter in college football, joining the growing list of Australians to win the award, and it was great to see the Wildcats end a disappointing season by beating 3 shades out of South Carolina 41-18.

Who knows where Max is headed for 2021… probably not down at Manning Memorial alongside his dad.

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