Well folks, as the flamethrowers and hand grenades prepare to destroy Cricket Australia from the ground floor up, much to our mirth, it’s time for another terrible Tuesday discussion, and I’ll start it off with a belated happy birthday to the one and only Jackass Jack Miller, who probably celebrated his 26th birthday with more than a few stoppies:

Just don’t let Pecco Bagnaia try one.

Actually, that crash could be a metaphor for the Australian cricket team after Adelaide.

I write without hyperbole that this India series was Australia’s most disappointing home Test series since the 2010-11 Ashes

The series defeat to South Africa in 2012 was a missed chance, especially after they couldn’t get rid of Faf du Plessis in Adelaide followed by the Perth blowout to seal it, then there was the 2016 series which was over by Day 1 in Hobart, but considering every piece of misfortune that hit India at regular intervals, from 36 all out, to Virat Kohli going on paternity leave, to the point that they were rendered India A in all bar name, to get totally outplayed and lose by the exact same scoreline as 2 years prior is the greatest national embarrassment since Cameron Bancroft decided to rub his penis with sandpaper.

But, on the flip side, you can say without hyperbole that this is the greatest international achievement in the history of Indian cricket, even greater than the 2018-19 tour of Australia, winning the 1983 World Cup Final when they apparently didn’t even belong on the same field as the West Indies, or stopping Steve Waugh’s Invincibles dead in their tracks after following on at Kolkata in 2001.

And another thing – You might think I’m upset over this, but given the way the WACA got shafted by those wankers at Cricket Australia all summer, I don’t feel an inch of sympathy for any of them.

Tim Paine – Opening his mouth and telling Ravi Ashwin “I can’t wait to get you to the Gabba”…

HOW’D THAT GO, YOU TISSUE EATING TOOL?

He’s fair dinkum turned into a poor man’s Kim Hughes.

A reminder once again that this team just won a Test series in Australia

Once all the deadwood was forcibly chopped off by Australian short-pitched bowling, they came good, and good on them.

Apparently Channel 7 don’t even know which country was playing India at the Gabba

Well, Channel 7 is the same network that thought the Dutch flag was the French flag…. Right after Paris had been attacked by terrorists.

Out of context Cricket Australia Tweet after that Nathan Lyon DRS Review

It’s the penultimate day in his Washington office for a certain WWE Hall of Famer, so here’s a musical tribute for 4 years of ‘work’

Please welcome him back for the 80th time on this website – Ladies and gentleman, Kevin Bloody Wilson!

John Alexander on the Australian Open situation

So in amidst all these articles of pampered tennis players complaining about being locked up in 5-star hotels with WiFi, a luxury several thousand overseas Australians can stab someone for, I noticed this article popped up on the old Auntie, with JA talking to ABC Radio’s The Ticket, and, in amidst describing the tournament as a compromised event because of all the COVID-19 positives, the Federal Member for Bennelong mentioned this:

One suggestion put forward was to host back-to-back events in December 2021 and January 2022, making Australia the epicentre of world tennis for two months.

JA: “Had that option been taken — and it still might be forced on us if we can’t get it up, starting on the 8th of February — that would’ve given much, much more time for us to come to terms with the COVID virus, much more time to make arrangements with players, it would have reduced the cost for setting up the various events because you’d be setting up for two events not just one.”

“We might also have seen who was going to be the greatest of all time because you might have a Djokovic or a Federer with two grand slams within a period of two months.”

Completely ignoring the fact that he’s been a Federal MP for a decade and probably suffered multiple concussions from Coalition talking points, surely John Alexander, a multiple doubles major winner and a Davis Cup champion who covered the sport on television for decades, would remember that one of the biggest problems with the Australian Open many decades ago was the fact that it STARTED SMACK BANG IN DECEMBER, which meant that barely any international top players were prepared to travel to Australia so close to the festive season, a situation that wasn’t totally resolved until the mid-1990s with Flinders/Melbourne Park establishing a new identity for the tournament.

The biggest sign of that was Andre Agassi finally choosing to play at Melbourne in 1995 after 8 years of waiting – He promptly won the Men’s Singles title and won it 3 more times in the early 2000s.

Having said that, you still get players who would like to see the tournament moved from January and closer to our Autumn, BUT – If timing was a problem until the tournament dates were semi-permanently changed to their current slots in 1987, it’d be a massive problem in 11 months time having back-to-back majors, especially with international borders and quarantine still being mandatory.

This Alinta Energy Ad should be praised for its true to life accuracy

Yageddit?

Because Pat Cummins is the one doing all the bloody work.

I think it’s fantastic the Queenslanders named a Cyclone after Kimi Raikkonen

“Kimi, you missed landfall on North Queensland, will you get over it?”

“Yeah well, I was having a shit.”

Hopefully they bury Phil Spector with the Orchestral version of The Long And Winding Road

Ruining Let It Be with his Wall of Sound bullshit was the second-worst crime of Spector’s life, behind making Lana Clarkson ‘Kiss the gun’…. precisely when he was holding the trigger.

Now, the version of The Long And Winding Road from Let It Be Naked….. that was how the song was intended to be released.

Perfectly simple to listen to.

Josh Giddey may be the best young Australian talent since Ben Simmons, but he dunks like Andrew Bogut

Call me crazy, but I think a Bay team will represent the NFC in the Super Bowl

Just saying