Cricket

BBL 09 Review: Round 4

Big Stoin doing what he does best – Admiring his own work
(All footage: Fox Cricket/Channel Seven/Cricket Australia)

To kick things off, I better fire this in before the Renegades somehow win tonight

I thought it was lovely of the Indians to make sure Aaron Finch got to experience that winning feeling at least once more this summer.

Anyway, what an utterly incredible week for individual (And team) achievements in the Big Bash – 2 hat tricks, a 5fer for Jimmy Pattinson, the worst bowling figures being beaten in consecutive days, D’Arcy Short’s highest-ever BBL score shattered by the Oil Rig, and the Scorchers smacked the Heat for 213… which was only good enough for 2nd best score of the week.


The Oil Rig’s record score of 147

This was 1st vs 2nd on the ladder, on a Sunday night in primetime – And the Sixers sure did resemble a No.2.

Not even a week after being fined for a homophobic slur towards Kane Richardson, and not even 2 days after scoring his first-ever BBL duck, Marcus Stoinis decided to give us the most graphic thing seen on a screen since Ned Beatty met those inbreds in Deliverance, with a lazy 147 off 79, including 13 fours and 8 sixes, easily passing D’Arcy Short’s previous record of 122 from BBL 07.

The Greek God also single-handidly gave Ben Dwarshuis the worst-ever bowling figures in BBL history (0/61 off 4), a record that had only been set the previous day by Ben Laughlin, who got carted for 0/60 by Mitch Marsh & Cam Bancroft – Stoinis handed Ben 51 of those 61 runs, equalling the legendary performance by Travis Head against Sean Abbott.

I suppose Ben had that coming, considering he looks like a typical 1920s silent film villain.

And the funny thing was, Stoinis should have had a crack at 150, considering Tom Curran’s last ball of the innings (Which was smacked for 6) was above waist height – Something that square leg umpire J.Feliciano couldn’t see.

I’m surprised Marcus didn’t call him a poof out of frustration, but that clearly shows he’s learned from that little incident.

So, not only was it the highest score in Big Bash history, but Big Stoin also equalled Aaron Finch’s record for most balls faced in a T20 innings (79 with Surrey in 2018), the 207-run partnership with Hiton Cartwright (A disappointing 59 off 40) was the highest partnership in Big Bash history, and the 7th highest partnership in the history of T20 cricket, and the Stars’ total of 219 was the 3rd-highest in BBL history.

Considering he’s currently wearing the ‘Golden Knob’ cap as the leading run scorer with 5 half-centuries, I think Big Stoin might just about be Player of the Tournament at this stage.

Unsurprisingly, the Green Machine won easily, and are in pole position to once again inexplicably choke in the Finals.


Mitch Marsh’s 93 off 41

8 sixes for The Big Bison in his personal best Big Bash score, but the craziest part of the knock was that he started 19 off 17 – By process of elimination, he carved out 74 off 24 balls.

Classic Brisbane Heat – Restrict teams to 126 and 110, and sandwiched in the middle they get treated like Mick Lewis against Herschelle Gibbs.

Of course, nobody remembers the fact that the Scorchers hit a team record 213… Because it wasn’t even the best score of the week.


2 HAT TRICKS ON THE SAME DAY


The random crap that happens on a Wednesday – There had only been 4 BBL hat-tricks prior to the 8th of January (2 of them by Andrew Tye) – There are now 6.

Part 1: Rashid Khan

Yep, it was Josh Hazlewood’s birthday, so it was only fitting that it was the birthday boy who strolled to the crease and ended the match in 3 balls.

It’s worth remembering that not even 12 months ago, Josh was considered a No.3 by Australian Test standards.

Part 2: Haris Wreck-It Rauf

Absolutely wild – Wreck It Rauf has played 6 games (Prior to tonight)… and yet he’s taken 15 wickets to sit 2nd behind Daniel Sams (On 17), who has played 9 games.

Hopefully someone can ask Sandeep to translate some of the gibberish coming from the many ex-cricketers posing as commentators.

For anyone wondering, this is the Hat-Trick interview.


Of course, we have to remember the Jack Edwards wicket of Rashid’s hat-trick was made possible by……

BBL UMPIRING

Apparently appealing like an absolute tosser does the trick.

From Twitter

This Week’s BBL FIELDING

First up: Samit Patel in the Melbourne Derby

And Dan ‘Frankie’ Worrall


Chris Green’s 3 month ban for an illegal bowling motion

There’s a solution to fixing this problem – Wear baggier sleeves.


Josh Lalor nearly turning into a human banana peel

I shouldn’t laugh – That type of accident was how Bruce Reid originally split in half, and spent the next 5 years duct-taped together.


The Craziness in the Heat-Hurricanes Game

Baz McCullum described this decision by Matty Wade to strand Ben McDermott as a BBQ of the highest order – I simply refer to it as BBL RUNNING.

Baz, that’s not a BBQ, that’s a deep frying so big that most of Scotland was mortified.

Crazy moment No.2 (And the most publicised one) was Matty Renshaw managing to (unknowingly) play the rulebook to get rid of Wade at the mid-on boundary rope, in a very contentious tag team with Tommy Banton.

So, despite the ball crossing over the rope mid-flight, and Renshaw coming from outside the field of play to bump it back in to Banton, by definition, both the fielder & ball weren’t touching the ground at any point when they made contact, meaning Wade was on his way.

Ah, the Big Bash.

And crazy moment No.3 – Ben Laughlin’s nomination for The Fatty Vautin Award to dismiss Clive Rose.

The sort of bloody incident you see being replayed and replayed, ad bloody nauseam!


7 Maxi-mums from Glenn in the Derby

The Melbourne Derby gave the people of Melbourne the fireworks they couldn’t get on New Years’ – Shaun Marsh hit a half-century, but Maxi trotted to the middle, and sent about 4 of those 7 sixes into the second tier.

One of them was this lazy effort into the Medallion Club.

Of course, Maxi was also in on the ‘Bushfire fundraising – That innings alone raised $1750!

83 off 45 for the artist formerly known as The Big Show, including 49 runs off his last 16 deliveries, including 6 sixes – And he was only in the middle for 47 minutes.

I should also point out – That six I just showed ended up as an absolutely effortless crowd catch taken by this unknown assailant.

Bravo sir – Your efforts shall be shown to patrons around the nation.


George Bailey Productions Presents: Man Getting Hit By Cricket Ball.


Seb Gotch is no Tim Ludemann

What’s the point of being a mic’d up wicketkeeper if you can’t impersonate John Howard?


AB’s first ball in the Big Bash

Easily dispatching Rashid to the off-side boundary like he was some cheap rate spinner.

2 catches and 40 off 32 for Abraham Benjamin, who is still untouched by the many curses that come with playing in the Big Bash.

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