Alright, it’s finally the end of the Australian season of rugbaleeg, so let’s knock this off like a bunch of armed burglars.
The game is listed to start at 7pm AEST/8pm AEDT, but won’t actually start until 8:15 because of all the boring pre-game crap.
Without the aid of his binoculars from the commentary box, Ray Warren will mix up more players than ever having to call the game from the Channel 9 studios in Sydney.
Phil Gould will get too distracted by Channel 9’s Cleary Cam, and mention Nathan’s Grand Final performance and how the Panthers were unlucky.
Someone on the broadcast will inevitably mention that in terms of crowd size, this is apparently the biggest sporting crowd since the pandemic began, and we’ll get the inevitable pan shot on Channel 9 of the apparently full Lang Park.
Someone, somewhere on Thursday will criticise the Queensland Government for allowing a full 52,500 people into Lang Park in the middle of a pandemic.
After the game, a Queensland player or coach, or possibly both at the same time, will make reference to revered and often unsuccessful Maroons antagonist Paul Gallen piling on the “Worst Queensland Team Ever” sledge fest on Sunday afternoon.
The stats people will note that this game will mark the first time since 1987, outside of the Super League era, that the Maroons will not be represented by anyone from the Brisbane Broncos, further proving how much Wayne Bennett loathes Paul White.
There will be some form of biffo requiring intervention from referee Sutton, which won’t even crack the Top 500 of greatest State of Origin fights ever seen.
Back for another swing after missing Origin II, Christian Welch will attack Nathan Cleary with some form of a blunt object on a last tackle kick by Cleary, sending viewership on the ‘Cleary Cam’ skyrocketing.
People will look at the Queensland team sheet, see the names Edrick Lee and Brenko Lee, and assume they’re brothers, or possibly cousins of Brett and Shane Lee.
Josh Addo-Carr will ‘out-Origin Gagai’ Dane Gagai and score at least once… not with anyone in the crowd, obviously.
James Tedesco will randomly win the Brad Fittler Medal as the best New South Wales payer.
Doesn’t matter if they win or lose, the Player Of The Series award will go to a Queensland player, probably Billy Slater, even though he’s been retired 2 years.
I will randomly make mention of Cameron Munster getting dragged into the Maroons team photo looking munted.
My pick – New South Wales will win a close one, Annastacia Palaszczuk will permanently shut the border at Tweed Heads to spite Gladys Berejiklian, and in the next opinion poll, Annastacia will earn a 100% approval rating from voters.