Average tipping score for this round = 7/8

Like everyone else, I thought I was on for a surefire 8/8 on Monday morning…..

Then the Bulldogs decided to field 17 Josh Addo-Carrs and belt the Eels all the way back to 1946.

North Queensland Cowboys 31 defeated St George-Illawarra Dragons 12 = Correct

Wasn’t it great to see Jonathan Reuben, the try-scoring Methuselah of rugby league, making his NRL debut at the age of 29 and setting a new record for the oldest debutant in league history.

Unfortunately for the Dragons, it’s probably the only league record they’ll be claiming this season, and as for the Cowboys, they probably won’t set any league records, but they will be right in the hunt for the Top 4, and that’s all Todd Payten needs right now.

South Sydney Rabbitohs 30 defeated Gold Coast Titans 16 = Correct

Another much-needed victory for the Bunnies, as Alex Johnston scored a hat-trick and brought up his milestone 150th NRL try in the process, becoming only the 15th player to bring up the 150 meat pie milestone, also surpassing his old teammate Greg Inglis who ended his career on 149 tries.

Alex Johnston scored a hat-trick….

It’s like death and taxes, a dog peeing against a tree, or Picasso painting a painting.

Melbourne Storm 26 defeated Sydney Roosters 18 = Correct

It came down to skill errors at crucial moments, and in situations like that you’d back the Storm 97 times out of 100, and most of the time they’ll get the job done, which is exactly what they did in the midst of a stern Roosters challenge, and all told Easts were just about their own worst enemy at times, especially when James Tedesco sent the kickoff out on the full to start the 2nd Half, which the Storm then turned into multiple repeat sets (And a try) that ground down the Chooks defence, which really told late on when they scored the last 2 tries to seal the win.

So another routine performance from Bellamy’s team, but on another note, have you ever noticed that Felise Kaufusi just happens to elbow players in their head area, but is absolutely definitely not a grub?

It’s an absolute mystery.

Brisbane Broncos 24 defeated Canberra Raiders 18 = Correct

You know what a win like that shows from Brisbane?

CHARACTER.

Character you don’t even see when Tom Hanks plays Forrest Gump, because good lord, the Green Machine tried to win a war of attrition to stop the Kevolution, but Kevvy got the last laugh on his old Raiders teammate in Ricky Stuart, although the casualty toll was bordering on catastrophic.

Kotoni Staggs, Selwyn Cobbo and Kurt Capewell all sidelined before the game.

Adam Reynolds suffered busted ribs during the game.

Payne Haas hurt his AC joint on his good shoulder, then suffered hurt pride when he got booed again.

Herbie Farnworth scored a double then busted his bicep and may not feature again this season, nor for England in the World Cup.

Corey Paix injured his knee.

Te Mare Matin played on with busted ribs…

And Corey Oates played on with a swollen hand that was the size of a hot air balloon.

So yeah, how the hell the Broncos managed to cling on to make it 7 wins in a row is a testament to everyone at Red Hill, borderline inconceivable after the events of the last 2 years, and luckily there’s only one more game until the league-wide bye for Origin II at the end of the month, and just having a look at it now….

OH DEAR GOD THEY’RE PLAYING THE STORM IN MELBOURNE

Well may we say God Save The Queen, because it seems nothing will save the crippled Broncos.

Manly Sea Eagles 30 defeated Wests Tigers 4 = Correct

Another horrible day for Wests Tigers, who found out the hard way that Michael Maguire’s disappearance hasn’t provided an immediate sign of improvement, as the Campbelltown locals witnessed them getting clubbed by a Manly team that didn’t have Daly Cherry-Evans, and the cherry on top was when Brent Naden dumped Jake Trbojevic on his head and became the first Tigers player to get sent off in the NRL since Corey Pearson was sent off for fighting by Shayne Hayne in Round 23 of 2002.

Randomly enough, Pearson was ultimately cleared by the judiciary, unlike Naden who has seemingly been handed a 4 game suspension.

On that note, there is another Tigers player who was sent off before Corey Pearson, and you can probably guess who he is….

Yep, it’s none other than John Hopoate in Round 19 of 2000, although it wasn’t for being a Proctologist, it was for fighting Dragons forward Terry Lamey, and even with Hoppa’s sketchy track record, he only copped a 1 game suspension.

Penrith Panthers 42 defeated Newcastle Knights 6 = Correct

An out and out training run for the Panthers in front of another bumper Knights crowd, and they probably thought they had a chance when they saw on the news:

“Cleary to miss clash against Knights.”

Ah, the Panthers PR team must still get a kick out of putting up Cleary related titles without specifying which one of them it is.

Unfortunately, the only problem for the Knights is that it wasn’t Nathan who was missing, it was Ivan due to being re-admitted to the ICU with blood clots in his legs, which may also go a ways to explaining Nathan’s below-par performance last Wednesday if his own father was in hospital:

So, with that said, it’s over to Ivan’s left hand man Cameron Ciraldo to keep his hands at 10 & 2 while Nathan works the pedals on the Panther Patrol, and if Ciraldo does it well enough, he’ll get the honour of being the next head on the block at the Wests Tigers.

Cronulla Sharks 38 defeated New Zealand Warriors 16 = Correct

You know the word on the street is they’re going to make a movie about the fortunes of the New Zealand Warriors since 2020, and it’s going to star Temuera Morrison….

It’s called Dunce Were Warriors.

Still, it will include Dallin Watene-Zelezniak’s clubhouse leader for Try Of The Year:

Canterbury Bulldogs 34 defeated Parramatta Eels 4 = Incorrect

The Eels are shown up as the Emperors with No Clothes for the 36th year running, and since being overlooked by Brad Fittler for New South Wales in Origin I, Josh Addo-Carr has scored 5 tries in 2 games.

NOT ONLY IS HE THE FASTEST MAN ON THE PLANET, HE’S ALSO THE MOST PISSED OFF MAN ON THE PLANET.