Based on a series of plausible events in a regional Victorian town

Well friends, on we go through this wild old winter, and I was pissing myself pink on Saturday, as I watched on in shock and awe as Crazy Craig not only picked a 25/1 winner, but GOT ALL OF HIS PICKS CORRECT.

And that doesn’t even include his vague mention of Think About It to win the Stradbroke Handicap.

What a moment in history, and to all those who reaped the several thousand dollar return you would’ve had if you backed all 3 runners (Without A Fight, Hard To Cross and Ginger Baker), I salute you.

Now, this weekend is just about the most boring weekend of the Winter Carnivals as we move out to the outer extremities of the cities, starting with the Ipswich Cup in Pauline Hanson country, the WJ McKell Cup at Rosehill, some races named after country people at Flemington, and the Belmont Guineas at Burswood, which luckily won’t be poisoned by West Coast playing next door.

So it’s on to Crazy Craig, and after last week’s utterly perfect fairytale display, it wouldn’t surprise me if he reverted back into the proverbial pumpkin and got absolutely nothing right, because he is, after all, a lunatic. But one thing he does have is a GOOD LUCK CHARM!

P(r)ick No.1: Teewaters (No.7, Barrier 8) E/W in Race 3 at Flemington (MR3), 1pm AEST

1420m 2YO Rod Johnson Handicap

Trainer: Dan O’Sullivan, Jockey: Declan Bates, 54kg

Hello hello hello friends it’s Craaaaaazy Craig, TBFB, Scratchie King of Bairnsdale, and my goodness, after last week they were ready to crown me EMPEROR of Bairnsdale!

I deadset must’ve paid for 5 months’ worth of scratchies with that Sandown winner, and let’s also say there’s going to be a few loose $50 notes on the footpath for people to find!

Anyway, that glorious moment was LAST WEEK, this time we have to THIS WEEK with a blank canvas and a crayon, and so this week I figured we’ll start off at headquarters with TEEWATERS, a nag I’ve backed previously with very little success, although I do seem to remember having him as a Value pick in the VRC Derby one year (2021) when he was about 31/1…

And wouldn’t you know it, he ran 3rd to Hitotsu!

So you know what, my name’s Crazy Craig, so I may as well be batshit crazy and back him again 4th Up, dropping 5 kilos on his last start 3rd, and he’s and rock hard fit against a bunch of horses who won’t be anywhere close to as good as that Derby field was in 2021, so to conclude, here’s my tribute to Teewaters!

P(r)ick No.2: Irish Songs (No.7, Barrier 1) E/W in Race 8 at Ipswich (BR8), 3:53pm AEST

1350m Listed Quality Eye Liner Stakes

Trainer: Louise White, Jockey: Larry Cassidy, 54.5kg

If Irish Songs doesn’t win, given he’ll need a gap in the straight that he won’t get because someone will just hug the rail, then to quote an Irish song….

I STILL HAVEN’T FOUND WHAT I’M LOOKING FOR….

a winner.

P(r)ick No.3: Rokanrori (No.7, Barrier 5) in Race 9 at Belmont (PR9), 4:57pm AWST

1200m 78+ Rating Peninsula Dining Room Handicap

Trainers: Grant & Alana Williams, Jockey: William Pike, 57kg

A last start winner with some Pike In The Last magic on his side, who also sounds like a very early Michael Jackson hit…

He rocks in the tree tops all day long
Hoppin’ and a-boppin’ and a-singing his song

All the little birdies on Jaybird Street
Love to hear the Rori go tweet tweet tweet
Rokanrori, rock-rock,
Rokanrori
Blow Rokanrori ‘Cause we’re really gonna rock tonight!

Enjoy your Saturday folks, stay safe, stay negative, GAMBLE WITHIN REASON, KEEP YOUR EYES ON THE ROAD, and remember, I’m Crazy Craig, and that’s why they call me Craaaaaazy Craig!