Based on a series of plausible events in a regional Victorian town

Alright friends, here we are at the first Saturday of 2025, as the New Year’s Day races ended with the Perth Cup delivering a 90/1 blowout at the hands of Pat Carberry, and we’ll find out if in the year 2025, if man is still alive, if woman can survive, and a bunch of other things.

Now, this Saturday includes the precursor to the now twilight Magic Millions meeting next weekend, although that poisoned section of the newly restored track has thrown everything out of whack, with the precursor twilight meeting now at the Sunshine Coast, which includes all of The Wave, The Syndicate and some 3YO slot race named after Sunlight….

Of course, all of it was going to be broadcast on Channel 7, so we’ll see if they can be bothered travelling to the great institute that is Corbould Park.

Randwick also hosts some boring crap, Ascot hosts the races that didn’t quite get run on Perth Cup day due to the heat, and Geelong hosts the Black Pearl Stakes, because the people of Geelong are fans of the Pirates of the Caribbean franchise.

“You are without a doubt the worst Listed race I’ve ever heard of.”

“But you have heard of me.”

So it’s on to Crazy Craig, and after missing last week because he was too busy watching the cricket, and prior to that he mistook a horse for a reindeer during the local Christmas parade, and this week he’s asked to forgo ABBA’s Happy New Year, plus Elvis Presley, and pay tribute to a recently departed character of Australian music….

Farewell to Chad Morgan, the Sheik of Scrubby Creek!

“It’s a dangerous game I’m playing, you’ve gotta be quick to last”
“When you’re at the wrong end of a shotgun, you run quick or cop the full blast”

P(r)ick No.1: Inside Man (No.9, Barrier 2) in Race 7 at Randwick (SR7), 4:15pm AEDT

1200m BM88 Precise Air Handicap

Trainers: Gerald Ryan & Sterling Alexiou, Jockey: ‘David’ Reece Jones, 53kg

Happy New Year Friends, it’s Craaaaazy Craig, TBFB, Scratchie King of Bairnsdale, and I’ll start off by saying farewell to another CRAAAAZY larrikin of Australia, the one and only Chad Morgan, the only bloke with worse teeth than King Charles…

Fancy that, another elderly performer who couldn’t quite out-live Keith Richards, but then again, if anyone can, my money’s on Cliff Richard!

Anyway, the first pick of the New Year comes in a 7-horse race at Randwick, as my New Year’s resolution was to be even CRAZIER than usual, and there’s no better way to start than a race with No Third Dividend, and I think we’ll go for the mafia’s least favourite horse…

INSIDE MAN.

P(r)ick No.2: Lady Shotgun (No.8, Barrier 13) E/W in Race 6 at the Sunshine Coast (BR6), 5:25pm AEST

1200m Class 6 Magic Millions Plate

Trainer: Angela Plumb, Jockey: Craig Williams, 58kg

Unfortunately, it seems the dramas with the Gold Coast track have probably killed the joke here….

A name like Lady Shotgun was very appropriate with how well she finished her last start to win at the Gold Coast a fortnight back, and how appropriate that on this day in which we pay tribute to Chad Morgan, I wind up backing a horse with a Shotgun for a name, because it was a memorable line in the Sheik of Scrubby Creek!

When you’re at the wrong end of a Lady Shotgun, you run quick or cop the full blast!

Rur Rur, Rur Rur Rur, Rur Rur!

Enjoy your New Year folks, stay safe, stay negative, KEEP YOUR EYES ON THE ROAD, and remember, I’m Crazy Craig, and that’s why they call me Craaaaaazy Craig!