Based on a series of plausible events in a regional Victorian town

After an arduous 12 months, we have arrived at the last Saturday of the 2024/25 season, the last Saturday of James Cummings with Godolphin after 8 years of a reasonably successful partnership, and there’s still a fair few major jockey and trainer premierships up for grabs, namely the Australian Jockey Premiership (William Pike leading 162 to Blake Shinn’s 158), the Victorian Metro jockey premiership (Blake Shinn 73 vs Craig Williams on 66), the Queensland Metro jockey premiership (Angela Jones on 65 vs Emily Lang on 64), and the WA Metro premiership (Pike on 101 vs Chris Parnham on 95)…. Dunno even know why I bothered mentioning training premierships, because the likes of Waller, Maher and Gollan have got them all sewn up, with Ciaron Maher having trained 326 winners (Thus far) to lead the Australian Trainers premiership along with record stakes earnings of $60,659,538, which included a single day take of $14,386,540 on October 19 when Bella Nipotina won The Everest (Growing Empire also finished 3rd and I Am Me was 10th) and Duke De Sessa won the Caulfield Cup.

What also might be one of the funnier stats this season is that James McDonald, even with his stint in Hong Kong, is currently 3rd for overall prize money earnings this season in Vic Metro races with only 13 winners… albeit 2 of them were Via Sistina winning the Cox Plate and the Mackinnon.

As for this Saturday, after almost 2 months out of action the Belmont track is seemingly refreshed and ready to go for the Belmont Classic, only problem being that all the regular Belmont punters will be across the road watching the Western Derby on Saturday afternoon, while Caulfield hosts the Group 3 Bletchingly Stakes, always an interesting lead into the upcoming Spring races, Morphetville hosts the Lightning Stakes, Mackay hosts the Mackay Cup, which will not be visited by either Ben or Harry Mackay,

Another major event of the day is Roebourne Cup, and if you want to know where Roebourne is, it’s 35km out of Karratha and 202km out of Port Headland, and if neither of those towns are anywhere close to you, that’s how you know you’re in the shit.

So it’s on to Crazy Craig, and this week saw us lose several legends, the greatest being the Prince of Darkness himself Ozzy Osbourne, and when you’ve got a bloke called Crazy Craig, there’s only one Ozzy song you need…. CRAZY TRAIN.

P(r)ick No.1: Stop The Rock (No.1, Barrier 14) E/W in Race 4 at Caulfield (MR4), 1:55pm AEST

2400m 3YO Handicap

Trainers: Patrick & Michelle Payne, Jockey: Tom Prebble (a2), 60kg

Hello hello everybody, it’s Craaaaaazy Craig, TBFB, Scratchie King of Bairnsdale, and on the last Saturday of the season, I’m jumping on the CRAAAAAZY TRAIN in tribute to Ozzy, and to start off with I’ve found a value pick with a name that was appropriate after he passed away…

STOP THE ROCK.

Stop The Rock… well they did, because Ozzy’s been promoted to glory!

P(r)ick No.2: Puntin (No.6, Barrier 10) in Race 10 at Randwick (SR10), 4:45pm AEST

1800m CG&E BM78 Handicap

Trainer: Bjorn Baker, Jockey: Ashley Morgan, 58kg

Trained by Bjorn Baker you say….

Let’s ask Col Hodges how to pronounce that:

P(r)ick No.3: Want A Winner (No.9, Barrier 11) in Race 6 at Belmont (PR6), 4pm

1200m 66+ Rating Handicap

Trainers: Sean & Jake Casey, Jockey: Chris Parnham, 56.5kg

Was 3/3, dropped back to the 1000 metres and got overhauled to suffer a first career defeat in start No.4, but now he’s back to the 6 Furlongs with a 2/2 career record…

And to answer the question Want A Winner, you should just ask Hot Chocolate, because according to them, Every 1’s A Winner baby, THAT’S NO LIE!

Enjoy your Saturday folks, stay safe, stay negative, GAMBLE WITHIN REASON, KEEP YOUR EYES ON THE ROAD, and remember, I’m Crazy Craig, and that’s why they call me Craaaaaazy Craig!