Horse Racing

The Chalk Eaters Guide Review: 14th December

2 WINNERS TODAY – I’M HOTTER THAN PERTH RIGHT NOW

Highlight of the day – The Candy Man breaking the Eagle Farm 1800m course record… while carrying the top weight!

The Candy Man can, Marge.

The Candy Man can.


Bam’s On Fire in Race 2 at Flemington – 3rd

Bam, I hate to say it, but if you were an icy pole, you’d be plain.

On the flip side, I can sound the Price Is Right Horn again.


Signore Fox in Race 6 (Razor Sharp Handicap) at Randwick – WINNER

Jesus H, how the crap did he pull that off?

HE WAS LAST ON THE RAIL AT THE TURN

And was still angling out from last near the 300.

And yet somehow, he came from absolutely nowhere to fly home and tip out Oriental Runner.

Then again, if you could trust a jockey to know something about getting a horse to flash home from last, it’d be Tommy Berry, and he said it best after the race – That was a win and a half!


Defibrilate in Race 7 at Flemington – WINNER

Bahahahahaahahaha, trying to back Pour Vous to beat Defibrilate.

That went about as well as Alan Jones attempting race relations with the Middle Eastern communities.

So Defibrilate went from $3.60 to $3.10 to 3.70, and still absolutely steamed it in with a textbook steer.

Lovely creature, and well done Paddy Payne, justifying once again why he’s No.1 in the Payne Power Rankings.

Flower of War – N/R – Ascot cancelled due to the heat

Bloody oath it was cancelled – It was that hot today that my hands melted into the steering wheel of the car.

Now I’m doing everything in life with my hands at 10 and 2.


Crazy Craig’s Tip Of The Day


LAYING Alward in Race 3 (Christmas Cup) at Randwick – LAY SUCCESSFUL

When Crazy Craig pick them, he picks them.

Alward drifted in the market this morning, showcasing the doubts that people not named Crazy Craig had about his ability to stay the 2400m, and as it turns out, with some justification, because he never really looked a hope of winning, after turning out as flat as a tack in the straight.

The prize went to a Godolphin castoff in Morton’s Fork, who found his way into the care of Richard Litt earlier this year, which has apparently done him the world of good…. I imagine Bossy will be getting Richard Litt somewhere in Sydney tonight, after this win!

Well done Crazy Craig, another victim with only 2 more attempts to come.

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