Horse Racing

The Chalk Eaters Guide Review: 29th February

What a day to put in a well-time stinker – My weekly viewership for the Chalk Eaters was well down after my Facebook ad didn’t get approved.

I tell ya, I think Sky Racing are on to me.

Anyway, in one of the more painful stories of the day, Koby Jennings was suspended for 6 weeks for not riding out the favourite Cafe Royal in the 7th at Newcastle – He only lost (officially) by 0.01L to Game Of Thorns.

The other tale of woe was Glen Boss and James McDonald’s bumper car battle in the straight in Race 4 at Randwick – Bossy was given the rod as punishment.

JMac also had a ripping yarn following the Chipping Norton, after he managed to lose both Randwick Group 1s in driving finishes to the Jamie Richards-Opie Bosson partnership (Probabeel and Verry Elleegant).

The obvious joke there being that James is also from that place east of the Tasman.

The last painful story of the day – The man we refer to as ‘Fourth’ at the Waterford TAB returned to sparkling form…. and managed to back 5 consecutive 4th place finishers.


Eric The Eel in Race 1 at Doomben – WINNER

I don’t remember Eric The Eel coming from last to win at the Olympics… That was more Stevie Bradbury’s thing.

I was half hoping that as a tribute to the actual Eric, all of the field would crash through the gates before the starter let them go, causing mass scratchings and leaving The Eel as the only competitor.

Still, it didn’t happen, so he dropped to last in the purple and white silks, and made a huge effort to circle the field from the 600m and overpower Malawi Gold in the drive to the line.

Eric did what he had to do, to the relief of everyone, and he’s apparently earned a Rosehill Guineas and Australian Derby shot once he goes further up in distance.


Catalyst in the Australian Guineas – 6th

Bahahahahaha, boy, not only did that blow up in my face, I’m still feeling the fallout a generation later.

In a display of dominance to cement him as arguably the best 3YO in the lane The Gator went chomp in an awesome display – Superstorm performed well above expectation for 2nd thanks to Pikey, but Catalyst…. the wheels just kept spinning.

The vets didn’t find anything abnormal, which seemed to be in line with Damian Lane’s comments from after the race:

 The race shape turned out terrible for him, the outsider going forward (Commodus) and really backing off the tempo from outside the lead really put us in a sticky spot.

I had to let him stride in the race early – He just raced a little greenly when I asked him, and without a horse close to him to chase like last start, I just feel he didn’t lengthen as well.

We’ll see how he pulls up and go from there, but it may be that he may need the blinkers back on.

Could be worse – He could be Alabama Express.


Dreamforce in the Chipping Norton Stakes – 8th

Scenes at the 200m mark when Te Akau Shark started roaring home:

And when he claimed Verry Elleegant on the post:

I don’t really have much to complain about – Dreamforce gave them a sight, but he couldn’t hang tough for long enough.

Another race where I could have just picked the favourite and succeeded – But this writer is a leopard who does change his spots.


Tuscan Queen in Race 8 at Ascot – 9th

Turns out it was an 1800m race, not a 1600m race.

Those 8s and 6s, I tell you, they look the same.

When Superstorm rocketed home for 2nd in the Australian Guineas, I thought that form reference was looking pretty good for Tuscan Queen.

And then the race happened.

That was disgusting viewing from start to bloody finish – Quite possibly the most repulsive thing seen on Australian TV since the Turkey Slap episodes of Big Brother.

Never a hope.


Crazy Craig’s Tip Of The Day


LAYING Fabergino in Race 6 at Flemington – Hahahahahaha, no.

We realised this at the Waterford TAB, but this race was The Gabster’s worst nightmare.

  • A 1000m race
  • It was in Melbourne
  • D.Oliver was riding the 8

Crazy Craig is like most biased Victorians – The moment a WA horse goes to Melbourne, they get plonked straight in the lay file.

That brilliant philosophy has been crapped on multiple times this season – Especially in Group 1 company.

This wasn’t a Group 1, but Fabergino still crapped on it with sparkling speed.

I think that performance from Fabergino (Sustained cruising speed) was what people expected Nature Strip to do in the Lightning, before he did a Nature Strip.

The big difference between them was Fabergino didn’t have a reputation in the Eatsern states, and she wasn’t $1.45.

Anyway, suck eggs Crazy, it’s back to the burn ward.

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