There’s a Melbourne Cup for the dishlickers… Surely it’s a bit much making them run 2 miles?

I was very disappointed this week – I put my hand up to train Alligator Blood after Allan Endresz cracked it with David Vandyke, but Allan didn’t answer my calls, probably because he thought my name was spelled with an ‘ATO’.

So now the Gator and Allan are Gai Waterhouse & Adrian Bott’s problem, and having done business with John Singleton for decades, this new four-legged circus should be a walk in the park for Gai.

So looking ahead, it’s the last weekend of Spring, and the Perth Masters hits the halfway mark with the Winterbottom Stakes, the Group 3 Festival Stakes at Rosehill, the Carlyon at Moonee Valley, the Recognition Stakes at Doomben, and another big event this weekend is the third Jericho Cup at The ‘Bool on Sunday, the race created in recognition of the Australian Light Horsemen.

Bill The Bastard would’ve eaten up the 4600m at ‘The Bool.

Of course, if you know your nags, the last Sunday of November is Japan Cup Day, and you’ll be interested to remember that this week (Wednesday to be exact) marked 30 years since Better Loosen Up (With Michael Clarke clinging on for dear life) left his mark on one of the world’s great races.

Of all the great overseas triumphs for Australian horses, from Phar Lap in Agua Caliente, to Takeover Target everywhere in Asia, Buffering in Dubai, to all the Royal Ascot winners, BLU’s Japan Cup should forever be ranked in the Top 5.

Another One (No.5, Barrier 11) in Race 3 at Rosehill, 2:25pm AEDT

1200m Class 2 TAB Highway

Trainer: Gary Colvin, Hoop: Jason Collett, 58kg

Gary Colvin?

Stuff any piece of information about the horse, here’s Freddie Mercury being Freddie Mercury, performing Another One Bites The Bust wearing nothing more than a pair of Warwick Capper’s shorts, a scarf, and a Montreal Canadiens hat.

Why?

Because he’s goddamn Freddie Mercury, that’s why.

Interesting to note that out of Another One’s 3 starts, of which he’s won twice, his only defeat was on debut to Lion’s Roar.

Lion’s Roar ran 2nd in the Group 1 Spring Champion Stakes to Montefilia.

If he handles the wide gate, then he’s going to go mighty close to pulling this off.

Deep Speed (No.4, Barrier 5) in Race 5 at Moonee ‘The’ Valley, 3:20pm AEDT

1200m Listed Colts & Geldings McKenzie Stakes

Trainer: Tony & Calvin McEvoy, Hoop: Luke Currie, 56kg

Nominated for the Magic Millions in January, Deep Speed out of Deep Field returns to the Valley on the back of running 3rd behind Shelby Cobra in the Listed Springtime Stakes at Flemington on Stakes Day a full 3 weeks ago, and as you may prefer to forget, Shelby Cobra went to Ballarat last week, and made the clear mistake of going to Ballarat.

Some would argue that Flemington run showed Deep Speed doesn’t handle the 1400m, given he weakened out from the lead and was beaten 2.25L lugging 59kg, but prior to that, he ran and won very well at the Valley 1200m with 60.5kg, pinging the lids and never looking like losing, even when he laid out in the straight.

Dropping a handy 3 kilos on that Flemington run, I’d imagine Luke Currie and the McEvoys have a narrow-minded determination to power through and lead the small field, and looking at the markets, it seems his closest threat is the Hayes horse Nicolini Vito.

I’ve got no idea what a Nicolini Vito is, but it sounds like a character from The Godfather who got killed by Michael Corleone during the Christening scene.

Piss Poor Perth Punting

So it’s Winterbottom Stakes Day, and the yearly rite of passage is to continually show the replay of the 2008 edition between Takeover Target and Apache Cat, simply because it’s the best match race seen in Perth racing for at least the last 30 years.

How the hell did Danny Beau, thanks to 2 useless black type wins, start $4.50 in a race that had Takeover Target and Apache Cat at their peaks.

Another unsolved mystery.

Trekking (No.1, Barrier 11) in the Winterbottom Stakes (PR9), 5:30pm AWST (8:30)

1200m WFA Group 1

Trainer: James Cummings, Hoop: The Wizard, 58.5kg

Well, this tip failed spectacularly last year, so in true Chalk Eaters spirit, I’m going to embody the definition of insanity by doing the same thing and expecting a different result.

With the complete lack of interstate raiders compared to last year’s Winterbottom, won by Hey Doc after slackening the speed and giving nothing a chance from the lead, it’s fair to say Trekking has got the 2020 Winterbottom in the place where his knackers used to be.

Funnily enough, I can’t ever remember any of the Sheikh’s horses winning in Perth, even when they were still running as Darley.

A fairly worthy favourite, Trekking has gone enormous in all 3 starts this Spring without winning – 2nd to Pippie in the G1 Moir Stakes, 4th in The Everest, and 2nd on the 6-day backup to Hey Doc in the G1 Manikato Stakes.

That is genuine Group 1 form that no other horse in this field can match, and completely disrespecting every other horse in the field, the only way Trekking will lose this race is either bad luck (Which got him on the rail last year), another horse beating him over the line, or a protest.

And, it goes without saying:

Cambist (No.12, Barrier 7) E/W in Race 10 at Ascot, 6:10pm AWST (9:10)

1600m Furphy Handicap

Trainer: Robyn Lockwood, Hoop: Shaun O’Donnell, 55kg

Robyn Lockwood, of course named after her favourite lock company:

Because apparently you have to lock up with Lockwood.

For some unknown reason, despite having fewer feature races, the Winterbottom card is a 10-race affair (Which has actually been the case for a few years now), rather than the 9 last week, which will mean the last is scheduled to run out beyond 9pm over in Sydney and Melbourne.

They should market it as Pike After Dark.

Anyway, for reasons I can’t explain with logic, I’ve gone with Cambist to run well in the last of the day, which is as wide open as a European freeway.

Tollman at 5/1, Money Maher 5.50, Cambist & Kelly’s Callisto at 7/1, Mystery Miss currently at $7.50, although it will probably get truckloaded if Pike wins the Winterbottom.

See?

I don’t ALWAYS back 2-1 shots.

Suffice to say, there’s plenty of live chances, but I went with Cambist to do something on the back of her 1st Up run in the driving rain a fortnight back, making up some good late ground to run 3rd to Dig Deep and Position Of Power, although the rain was that strong, I can’t actually tell where the mare was in running:

That day Shaun O’Donnell used an outboard motor instead of a whip to get Cambist to run on.

An important note is that the Ear Muffs go OFF first time, so we’ll see if there’s any benefit.

Crazy Colin’s Wine Drinkin’ P(r)ick Of The Day

LAYING Prezado (No.5, Barrier 1) in the Carlyon Stakes at Moonee Valley, 5:20pm AEDT

1000m Listed Set Weights & Penalties

Trainers: Matthew Ellerton & Simon Zahra, Jockey: Jamie Kah, 57kg

G’day friends, it’s Crazy Colin here, making an impromptu appearance because Craig’s gone with his brother Dave to the Main Hotel in Bairnsdale, and they couldn’t take me because I’d apparently get them barred for stealing a carton of piss, or getting hungry and making myself a hamburger in the kitchen!

I told them don’t you worry, because I’d make one for both of you as well, because I’M NOT SELFISH!

So that said, I didn’t have a big afternoon, so stuff you Craig, it’s Colin’s time now, and we’re going STRAIGHT to The Valley!

Taking a look at this Carlyon Stakes race at the Valley, it appears to be a fairly open event, headed up by 1000m specialist Prezado and the Godolphin horse Coruscate, but I’ve GOT MY DOUBTS about Prezado!

If you look at his record at the 1000m, it’ll read 16 starts for 6 wins (His only career wins) and 4 placings.

Fairly good all told!

BUT – If you look at his Valley record, it’s 3 starts for just one minor placing!

The Valley 1000m is VERRRRYY different to the Flemington 1000m, don’t you worry about that!

And, further to it, he’s 1st Up tomorrow, and from 6 1st Up runs, he’s finished 2nd 4 times without winning!

Feel free to prove me wrong, but I don’t like the chances of Prezado tomorrow!

Crazy Colin, saying ADIOS.