So after the Chooks somehow ran over the Sharks on Saturday night, I had 5/6, and the only pick I missed was Manly winning thanks to DCE’s drop goal at the death, which made me think that yeah, I’m on for another decent round here.

Then Sunday comes around, and like death and taxes…

I ENDED UP WITH 5/8.

South Sydney 35 defeated Brisbane Broncos 6 – Correct

It was like shelling peas for Souths against the Broncos, and it was so easy that Adam Reynolds did what hasn’t been done in First Grade rugby league since another Bunnies superboot in Eric Simms and the Immortal Bob Fulton went at each other in the 1970 Grand Final…

HE KICKED A 2-POINT FIELD GOAL.

I suppose it just had to be Adam Reynolds to break the 2-point field goal hoodoo with the form he’s in.

New Zealand 12 defeated by Manly 13 – Incorrect

You know, if there’s a Sea Eagles game and the scores are tied late on, they’re only going to one bloody player to kick the winning drop goal.

The Warriors were defeated by Daly Cherry-Evans, the player who has apparently kicked more game-winning field goals than anyone else in the NRL era, sparking a pile-on unseen at the Silvertails since the 2011 Grand Final win, as they cracked it for their first win in 2021 to escape the cellar.

And honestly, after the shizen they dished up in the first 4 rounds, can you blame them?

Penrith 30 defeated Canberra 10 – Correct

It’s clear to see that based on the scoreline, the English Raiders players were demoralised after learning that Prince Phillip had died.

That and the Panthers fans were taking the piss out of the Viking Clap.

Gold Coast 42 defeated Newcastle 18 – Correct

The Titans didn’t just whip the Knights like Mick Dittman used to whip horses, they bloody well sliced the Novocastrians so thoroughly it was like watching a clay sculpture being reshaped.

5 games into the season, the Titans have scored now 40 points twice, the first time they’ve ever done that in a season, and David Fifita became the first forward to score a hat-trick in the NRL since Tariq Sims for the Dragons against the Broncos in the 2018 Elimination Final.

Canterbury 18 defeated by Melbourne Storm 52 – Correct

Well, the one thing we can definitely take away from this game is that the Doggies definitely won’t win the premiership, given they’ve conceded 50 points in a game.

That said, I think it shows how utterly horrific the Berries were in the past 3 rounds that in a game they lost by 34 points and conceded 52, that they apparently have signs of life based solely on the fact that they scored 18 points, which makes this their highest score of the year.

Sydney Roosters 26 defeated Cronulla 18 – Correct

I recall reading briefly seeing an NRL Supercoach article in Townsville Bulletin this passed Wednesday describing Sam Walker as “uber talented.”

After seeing him stand up in the final 15 minutes to turn the game on its ear, I completely agree, and it’s appropriate they use the word uber, considering the Broncos completely stuffed up signing Walker by only sending an Uber to Ipswich to pick him up for his contract meeting at Red Hill in 2019, and advising his parents not to attend said meeting.

HE WAS 16 BLOODY YEARS OLD.

Anyway, staying on the subject of shithouse management, apparently the Sharks board are going to give the arse to coach John Morris, which would be consistent with the near-total lack of support they’ve given him since he was appointed AS A FIRST TIME HEAD COACH WHEN THE CLUB HAD A CRAP ROSTER AND HAD JUST BEEN DONE FOR CHEATING THE SALARY CAP.

What did they expect him to do, turn water into wine and make cripples walk again?

Wests Tigers 30 defeated by North Queensland 34 – Incorrect

That game was the absolute essence of everything Wests have dished up in the last decade:

They had a big occasion, which was honouring the life of Tommy Raudonikis.

There was a huge crowd in at Leichhardt.

They were against a team they should, on the balance of probabilities, have been taking the 2 points against….

AND THEY CAPITULATED IN THE 1ST HALF AND GOT BOOED OFF THE GROUND AT HALF TIME.

Then they produce a huge comeback and get back within a try, only for their highest-paid player to drop the kickoff in the final minute and kill off any long odds hope of a miracle.

That was the Cowboys’ first win at Leichhardt Oval since 2000, which was their only win in 11 previous visits to Balmain’s old home ground.

Parramatta 12 defeated by St George-Illawarra 26 – Incorrect

Another fantastic performance by Hook’s Red V to end the Eels’ unbeaten start, and just on that penalty try for Matt Dufty in the 1st Half, which Greg Alexander described as Nathan Brown grabbing Matt Dufty (Which he did and was correctly punished for)….

But, if you look on the reverse angle, Browny definitely grabbed the ball…. Just not the correct one.