Based on a series of plausible events in a regional Victorian town

Well as the racing world keeps on turning towards whatever boring crap races we’ve got around the country on Saturday, Royal Ascot rages on for another year in sunny Old Blighty, and Frankie Dettori may or may not have misjudged the ride on Stradivarius and given him Buckley’s in pursuit of a fourth Ascot Gold Cup, annoying a few people in the process…

However, none of them even matter, because a story this week so CRAZY even Crazy Craig & Colin won’t touch it was that of Kiwi jockey Jason Waddell, who was already suspended for 22 months for refusing to provide a urine sample back in December, was given a further concurrent 10 year suspension for threatening to kill Waikato Racing Club chief executive Andrew Castles, allegedly a few hours after he’d received the first suspension.

Yes, you’d be forgiven Danny Nikolic and Terry Bailey were masquerading in New Zealand, and to be honest, that story sounds so much stranger when you read it with the theme to Curb Your Enthusiasm blaring in the background:

“When you get banned for 22 months but decide to tack on another 8 years.”

So cutting to the chase, now it’s on to Saturday and Crazy Colin and his CRAAAAZY picks, which really need to pick up again after he went like a busted arse last week, and for this week’s theme music, CC has informed me that today – June 18 – is Sir Paul McCartney’s 79th birthday, so he’s requested a classic McCartney song that he performed in his time with Linda and Denny Laine in Wings.

On that note, all I can say is wait for the bagpipes, because it’s MULL OF KINTYRE!

Miracle Street (No.13, Barrier 4) E/W in Race 5 at Rosehill, 1:50pm AEST

1100m BM72 The Agency Real Estate Handicap

Trainers: John, Michael and Wayne Hawkes, Jockey: Brenton Avdulla, 54kg

Hello again chumps, it’s Crazy Colin, Crazy by association to Crazy Craig, and YES, it is Sir Paul McCartney’s 79th birthday today, and I know that because Paul was always my favourite Beatle!

Well, if you don’t count George Harrison.

Moving on from elderly musicians, and I’ve been told by JT to pull my finger out or piss off from the picks, so this week I’m heading straight to boggy Rosehill, which most people tend to avoid this time of year because it’s what you’d call in the old language a ‘quagmire’, but I say LOOK FOR THE WET TRACKERS, and that’s what I’m doing here by going for a drive down Miracle Street at the odds!

Yes folks, I’m not afraid to look wide, don’t you worry about that!

After starting her career with a win and 3 second placings, and doing her best work on rain affected ground over 1000m to 1100m, John Hawkes sent her out to the 1300m at Warwick Farm a fortnight back, but despite getting the box seat, she just didn’t finish off the way she did over the short courses and ran a competitive 4th, beaten 0.9L behind Van Giz, who ran 2nd on Monday.

Another big key from that race – It was on a Good track, whereas Rosehill tomorrow will be somewhere around a Heavy 8 or a Soft 7, and as I previously wrote, the mare clearly loves getting the floaties on and going for a swim, because she broke her maiden and ran 2nd in her 2 starts on Heavy tracks, and racked up another 2nd placing on her only Soft track start!

Sure the competitiveness of those races could be questioned, but that suggests to me that the wet track form is there!

There’s probably better horses in the race, but you know what I say to them?

DILLIGAF.

So for no reason other than wet track form, I hope it’s MIRACLE STREET by name and Miracle by nature, because she is my Each-Way PICK OF THE DAY.

Dice Roll (No.13, Barrier 7) in Race 8 at Flemington, 4pm AEST

1420m Brian Beattie Handicap

Trainer: Nick Ryan, Jockey: Fred Kersley, 54.5kg

Heading back to headquarters for the first time in a fortnight, I’m hitching on to the bandwagon of the French horse from France, via the way of Honkers, DICE ROLL, who has won his first 2 starts in Australia since he journeyed over via steamboat.

Personally, my main question about the galloper – If they do roll him, do they call him the Tumbling Dice?

Dice Roll is on track to be the most followed horse of Saturday’s meeting at Flemington, because in the second of his two wins almost 6 weeks ago at Sandown, he knocked off Yulong January and Biometric, and if you want to know how strong that form is holding, Yulong January has won back to back starts since and lines up again in this race, and Biometric won his next start at Caulfield, and he’s back for vengeance as well!

Now, the other big question I’ll be posing about the Dice Roll is that both of his wins have been on Good 3 tracks, where as Flemington will definitely be playing a Soft, but his wet track form back in France, which has a little bit more rain than Melbourne, appears to be sound, as he’s won 2 out of 4 starts on Soft tracks, and he’s 1/1 on Heavy.

Sure, Rubisaki has the Group 1 form and Yulong January and Biometric have won since, but I reckon Dice Roll has the upside, a barrier that gives him plenty of options, and the other important bit of consistency is that Fred W. Kersley, the grandson of the Sultan of the Sulky turned trainer of Northerly Fred Kersley, and the son of Gavin ‘Group 1’ Eades, retains the ride.

I’m hoping that young Freddie can do the Kersley name proud in this race, because DICE ROLL is my PICK OF THE DAY.

As always strangers, enjoy your weekend more than Crazy Craig will, because I’m going to be stealing his beers, and on that note, goodbye, and GOOD LUCK!