Based on a series of plausible events in a regional Victorian town
Well folks, what a brilliant week for the jockey ranks of Australia.
Tommy Berry got a month off for causing the fatal fall for Xtremetime in last weekend’s Silver Shadow Stakes that put Brenton Avdulla in hospital, and my word Crazy Craig was none too happy about that, given Avdulla couldn’t ride Think It Over.
Glen Boss was given the all-clear to go into quarantine at Howard Springs so he could get to Melbourne in time for the Spring and ride the Melbourne Cup favourite Incentivise, then for whatever reason the Northern Territory officialdom decided they didn’t want Group 1 Glen, so Bossy had to go back to Sydney and ride out the spring there.
I can only assume the NT coppers backed Bivouac during the autumn and wanted a square-up with Bossy, so that means Brett Prebble now has the gig on Incentivise, who is apparently the most promising stayer since Might And Power.
Then there was the big news that 4 Victorian-based jockeys had gone to a Mornington Airbnb for a little get-together, which got sprung due to a noise complaint, and it turned out the 4 jockeys were none other than Jamie Kah, who you may remember recently won the Melbourne jockey’s premiership in a canter, Ben Melham, Ethan Brown and apprentice Celine Gaudray.
First they each copped 2-week suspensions for breaching the racing bubble, then the Victoria Police fined them $5452 apiece for breaking lockdown laws, and the Coup de grâce came from the Racing Victoria stewards, who gave the four of them 3-month suspensions, ending their Spring Carnivals before they began.
Coming to cinemas this Spring – DUDE, WHERE’S MY KAH.
It makes you forget the more serious issue that 2 people were arrested by Victoria Police on Wednesday in a race fixing probe, so on that cheerful note, it’s time for Memsie Stakes Day at Caulfield, the traditional kick-off for Group 1 racing during the Melbourne Spring Carnival, although it appears this Spring is going to be just like the last one….
In addition, with Rosehill gripped by the plague, Kembla Grange gets another guernsey with the San Domenico Stakes & The Ming Dynasty meeting moved out to the ‘Gong, featuring the Golden Slipper winner Stay Inside, the Leon McDonald Stakes at Morphetville, and the Idyllic Prince Stakes at Belmont, named after the horse who won the old Goodwood Sprint in four consecutive years.
So on that note, it’s on to ‘Crazy’ Craig for his Picks of the Day, and accompanying him as always, it’s the familiar sound of Cliff Richard not singing something about Christianity, because he’s got LUCKY LIPS!
Each-Way Pick of the Day: Zakat (No.4, Barrier 7) in Race 8 at Kembla Grange, 3:50pm AEST
1200m BM88 Ranvet Handicap
Trainer: James Cummings, Jockey: Kerrin McKevoy, 55.5kg
Hello hello hello weirdos, it’s Crazy Craig, The Boy From Bairnsdale, and let me confirm one thing – I DID NOT TIP OFF THE COPS ABOUT THE JOCKEYS AT THE AIRBNB!
If you ask yours truly, if Jamie Kah had been part of the State Government, she would’ve got away with it scot free, but instead, we now get to spend the entire Spring not having to deal with the muppets on TV going on about the fact that Jamie is a woman who rode 100 winners in a season!
I BLOODY WELL GOT IT THE FIRST TIME, YOU MEATHEADS!
So with a Group 1 Saturday fast approaching, I’ve buttered up for Round 2 at Kembla, which has gone from being a Good 3 Temple of Speed to a Soft 7 Octopus’ Garden after a heavy downpour in Illawara, and to prepare for the big meeting, I’ve come back with another joke that Crazy Colin told me a few weeks ago!
What is the favourite pet of French families?
I nearly had a heart attack because of laughing so hard the first time I heard it, but it appears Colin was actually trying to pick Godolphin gelding Zakat, who comes into this 2nd Up after finishing 3rd at the track last time out, where he wasn’t a winning chance against Big Parade but still fought on well, even as he got hit on the head by another rider’s whip at the 200 metres!
How crazy is that!
Still, I’m not one to back short-priced favourites all day every day, so despite King of Sparta and Tycoonist being the market picks, I think Zakat can run in the Trifecta at the very least, for a number of reasons:
- I’m not all there, don’t you worry about that
- He’s finished in the placings on 15 of his 20 runs, albeit for only the 3 wins, which suggests to me that he is consistent at the very least!
- His wet track form is very decent – 6 starts for 2 wins and 2 minors on the Soft, and 2 placings from 2 goes on the Heavy
- He seems to go much better with the benefit of a 1st Up run, because his 2nd Up record is 5 starts for 2 wins and a minor placing
And lastly, how bad could it be, I hardly pick a winner anyway!
So there you go, Zakat to go MEOW, because he’s my value pick of the day.
Pick of the Day: Ayrton (No.11, Barrier 12) in Race 9 at Caulfield, 5:20pm AEST
1400m Neds Filter Form Handicap
Trainers: Mick Price & Michael Kent Jnr, Jockey: John Allen, 55kg
On to the main meeting of the day at Caulfield, and I have no intention of picking anything in that Memsie Stakes, because we’ve got the returns of two handy horses in Masked Crusader in Race 5 (The Heath Stakes) and Ayrton, who could wind up being the two best-backed horses on the entire card, but if I had a preference, I’d go with Ayrton, which will be my famous last words!
Now knackers, I’ve got a little exclusive for you, because I was able to get my hands on the tape of Ayrton’s trial before he resumes on Saturday…..
See how well he handled those corners!
So while that Ayrton was alright on four wheels, this Ayrton has shown he’s alright on four legs, winning 4 out of his 5 starts as a 3-year-old (4 of them while starting under $2), with the only blemish coming when he couldn’t quite haul in Apache Chase in the Fred Best during the Queensland winter, which cost him a start in the Stradbroke, but he buttered up and won the Gunsynd Classic to end the season on a good note!
Of course, Mick Price and Mick Kent decided not to let Ayrton drown in a Group race 1st Up, so instead they’ve applied the sandbags and entered him into this Benchmark 88 against what could be described as some fairly average talent, and in addition to having a wide gate to deal with, Ayrton is one of the high-profile horses impacted by Jamie Kah and the Mornington piss-up, so John Allen, the Irishman from Ireland goes aboard.
I could tell you stories about some of the things Crazy Colin has said about John Allen, and honestly it’s a miracle John hasn’t been put in witness relocation as a result!
In conclusion, my un-named friend in Shepparton once told me 22 years ago that there’s no such thing as a good thing, no matter how short they start, but there is such a thing as a PICK OF THE DAY, because it’s AYRTON for me!
Enjoy your weekend as best you can friends, and remember, I’m Crazy Craig, and that’s why they call me CRAAAAAZY CRAIG!
JT here, as for who I’m picking in the Memsie Stakes…. just read the stubby holder:
Categories: Horse Racing
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