AFL

Tuesday Tithbits: 26th April

So it’s the last Tuesday of the month, it’s exactly 36 years since Chernobyl took off, and in yesterday’s ATP Rankings update, an 18-year-old Spaniard named Carlos Alcaraz made his first appearance in the Top 10 after winning the Barcelona Open…

By pure coincidence, exactly 17 years earlier, an 18-year-old Spaniard did the same thing:

On the 25th of April, 2005, an 18-year-old Rafael Nadal made his first appearance in the ATP’s Top 10 Singles Rankings thanks to his victory against Juan Carlos Ferrero in the Barcelona Open Final the previous day.

And hilariously enough, Carlos Moya is now Rafa’s long-term coach

17 years later, Rafa has remained in the Top 10 for a record 866 consecutive weeks.

In the 17 years since, Nadal has come close to falling out of the Top 10 twice, both times in 2015:

After Nadal lost to Djokovic in the Quarter Finals at Roland Garros, Jo Wilfred-Tsonga played Stan Wawrinka in the Semi Finals – Had Tsonga won, Nadal would’ve dropped to World No.11 instead of No.10, but alas, Wawrinka won in 4 sets, then defeated Djokovic to win the title… he was the only player to defeat Djokovic at a major that year.

Then at Wimbledon, Nadal lost in the 2nd Round to Dustin Brown, and in the Quarter Finals, Gilles Simon had to defeat Roger Federer to leave Rafa outside the Top 10, but it’s Roger Federer at Wimbledon, so Nadal was always safe, and he earned enough points in North America after missing the 2014 swing, to stay in the Top 10 come the end of the year.


The 2022 Bowls WA Community Shield is on this weekend at Hilton Park

Just before play got underway last year

Always a highly anticipated event, community bowls teams and Sherman Pisstanks of Western Australia will converge on Hilton Park Bowling Club to end the month of April, and once again the Manning Bowling Club will be represented by 3 teams from Manning Jack Attack, the Greatest Social Bowls Competition between Manning Road and the Canning River.

The Great Bowls of Fire, back in the ring for another swing at Hilton Park, and I can confirm Todd, Bruce, Jonesy and Rede are going the extra mile this year…. WITH SPONSORED TEAM SHIRTS.

2nd placed Manning Up, who gave up a Saturday game of golf to take their pink headbands to Hilton Park after hitting the big time last season in Jack Attack.

And representing the 4th placed Top Shots, it’ll be Sally alongside Mick, Peg & Ronni, in place of Gerry & Irene as Gerry is off for surgery this week, under the guise of Team 180…. or something close to that, but rest assured it’s got 180 in it.

Another highlight from a Manning perspective may very well be the appearance of one Brad Hogg in his role as Bowls WA Ambassador, although if it’s anything like last year, the team that gains Hoggy’s services in the raffle is going to draw the short straw, because several of us were eyewitnesses to Hoggy bowling on the wrong bias.

Well, in fairness to the great man, he was the master of bowling a wrong’un in his cricketing days.

So anyway, I’ll be there, otherwise nobody will know how the Manning teams faired.


The Hawthorn vs Sydney score worm looks like a stock market crashing

Which is appropriate, because it also accurately conveys my crashing happiness levels during the last quarter.


The figures from the Melbourne Storm’s 70-10 atomic bombing of the Warriors last night at AAMI Park

The Melbourne Storm scored 10 tries in the 2nd Half, the first time any team has done that in a 2nd Half in the NRL era, and the Storm’s 54 points is the official record.

The New Zealand Warriors had the ball a mere 6 times in that 2nd Half… they completed 2 sets.

Xavier Coates quite literally scored more tries in an 8 minute burst (3) than the Warriors completed sets (2) in 40 minutes.

The Storm recorded 1838 running metres for the game… the Warriors recorded 679, which may very well be the biggest discrepancy in running metres ever recorded.

In fact, it was so lopsided that Nelson Asofa-Solomona, a big front rower who should not be putting a football anywhere near the vicinity of his boot, put up a bomb on the Warriors’ tryline when the score was 18-10…..

Ryan Papenhuyzen came down with the ball and scored a try, which was the true start of the avalanche, as the Storm went on to score 48 more points in the next half hour.


The Perth Wildcats’ Australian sporting record 35 year NBL playoff streak is over… By 2 bloody points

Typical… they let a guy called Scott Morrison come into WA, and look what happens.

That name is jinxed, I tell you.

But it’s real, and the Wildcats streak is over after 35 years, an Australian sporting record that may never be surpassed, because by comparison, the longest First Grade rugby league finals streak is the St George Dragons on 23 straight appearances between 1951 and 1973, and the VFL/AFL record is Hawthorn on 13 between 1982 and 1994.

The Melbourne Storm would’ve been tomato sauce odds to make their 20th consecutive NRL finals appearance this season… But ya know, they did rort the salary cap and got found out in 2010.

Of course, it’s also been that long that when the Wildcats missed the playoffs in 1986, several major things hadn’t happened in Western Australia:

– Brian Burke was still an upstanding Premier of WA.

– More than 2% of Perth residents liked Alan Bond

– The Wildcats were still playing at Perry Lakes and were a year away from moving to Challenge Stadium, where they now haven’t played for 10 years.

– The West Coast Eagles hadn’t been founded yet… The inaugural playing group wasn’t revealed at the Merlin Hotel until October 20, 1986, which was the day after the ’86 NBL Grand Final series finished in favour of the 36ers.

– The America’s Cup in Fremantle was still 4 months away from being held.

I suppose it was more than a coincidence that the Wildcats season went south when the great Jack Bendat, who owned the team between 2007 and 2021 when they won 6 championships, died in February…

But, as Ricky ‘Amazing’ Grace said:


Stephen A. Smith live roasting Ben Simmons for 5 minutes

“Ben Simmons might also be the weakest, most pathetic excuse for a professional athlete we have ever seen in, not just American history, but the history of sports.”

I wholeheartedly agree, after sitting out an entire NBA season just so he could get paid without making a single appearance on court, then saying he’d come back for a must-win Game 4 and reneging on that, in the process quitting on yet another team this season, Ben Simmons has proven he isn’t hard enough to be an Australian, and he isn’t even enough of a socialite to be a Kardashian.

Actually, the Kardashians probably don’t want to be associated with Ben Simmons, probably because they know a socialite when they see one.


A moment that wasn’t ‘notably’ mentioned during the Emilia Romagna GP

Rudolf Ratzenberger, the father of F1 driver Roland Ratzenberger, who tragically died in a crash the day before Ayrton Senna at Imola in April of 1994, returned to the Bologna track where his son lost his life 28 years ago, as an official guest of Formula 1:

89 years young (From Motorsport Magazine)

As pointed on the Formula 1 subreddit, that photo is Rudolf with one of his son’s crash helmets (Obviously), and he’s also wearing an original jacket of the Simtek team whom Roland was driving for at the time, alongside David Brabham.

It also should be noted that Rudolf and his wife Margit did visit Imola in 2014, on what was the 20th anniversary of Roland and Ayrton’s deaths, but this weekend may very well have marked the first time Mr Ratzenberger has returned to Imola for a Grand Prix since his son’s crash.

A moment of more historical weight than any of us will ever realise.


My favourite moment of the Emilia Romagna GP was Sky Sports continually crossing to Nico Robserg in his cave and Nico routinely sounding like he was laughing while pointing out that Lewis Hamilton couldn’t pass Pierre Gasly for 50+ laps

It’s a good thing they kept showing Nico from above the chest, because he was probably at half mast the whole afternoon.


What’s noticeable about Jack Miller going into the Suzuki garage to apologise to Joan Mir and his crew after taking Joan out in Portugal IS…..

Unlike plenty of garage confrontations, Jack didn’t have his helmet on.

Long gone are the days when the Jackass would get involved in falls with other riders and subsequently shove them and kick their bikes.


Absolute madman goes 1 out in every leg of the Albany Quaddie, and takes a Double, a Treble and a 4-leg all up as well

So here’s the start – On a dull Sunday afternoon in the land of Racing Twitter, Super Multi Tips took $450 worth of all-ups in the Quadrella legs in the Sunday meeting at Albany with Ladbrokes, plus a $50 quaddie ticket in which he took an outsider in every leg, but instead of doing the sane thing like us losers, he went ONE OUT IN ALL FOUR LEGS, which meant from a $50 straight quaddie he had a percentage of 5000%.

Normally going one out goes to crap the moment you even think about it, but here’s what happened:

Art Admirer won Leg 1/Race 4 at $7.70 – TICK.

Next, Little Punga won Race 5 at $14, ensuring the ‘Double’ super-multi would at least win and he might get four figures.

Then in the 3100m Jericho Cup Qualifier, Baronova ran the entire field ragged at $9, further adding to the doubles win with a treble win, and he was still alive in both his four-leg all-up and the quaddie, and by now it was “Holy crap, he could pull this off!”

So then it all came down to Athlone Castle in the last race on the card, with the 3 kilo apprentice Taj Dyson having no f**kin’ clue of the glory he could be about to deliver….

It looked up the creek when Althone Castle jumped slowly and got caught 3 wide in the run, but he tracked into the race, went head to head with Trevello, and wouldn’t you believe it, Athlone Castle won the race by a head, and the entirety of Twitter awaited with bated breath at the payout about to ensue.

4-leg Multi win = $418,225.50

Treble Win = $143,552

Double Win = $22,763.60

Quaddie Win = Could’ve been $488,580, but under Ladbrokes’ exotic rules, he was paid out the entire Super-TAB quaddie pool, which was $104,107.57, rounded up to $104,108.

All that said, total winnings from $500 worth of tickets = $688,649.

The things that happen in the Great Southern.


And finally, The Chaser’s Leaders Debate remix song about Scott Morrison loving coal is now up to No.1 on the Australian iTunes charts

If you haven’t heard this latest track that’s been tearing up the dance floors of Australia for 36 hours, I’ll say that the following audio is Unsuitable for NewsCorp readers.

What a country.

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