Coming soon to a screen near you: Sky Canine Central

So now that we’re just shy of the halfway mark for 2022, we roll on to the last Saturday in June, right before things go really quiet for a month in the howling dark of Winter, and the end of June sees the last Group 1 of the racing season, the Tatts Tiara at Eagle Farm, and luckily someone didn’t make a typo and call it the Tits Tiara….

Although if they did, it’d be the closest I’ve ever had to a race being named after me.

As for the other boring races on the day, the Eagle Farm undercard has a whole stack of them, with the 2400m Group 3 Tattersall’s Cup, the Battle of the Bush + The W.J. Healy Stakes, named after Ian ‘Twistie Fingers’ Healy, there’s the Listed Civic Stakes at Randwick, or ‘Shivic Shtakes’ if you’re Kenny Callander, and at Belmont, which is in Burswood, they have the Group 3 Strickland Stakes, which was probably named after the school principal from Back to the Future.

So it’s on to Crazy Craig, and after striking a purple patch in the last 2 weeks with 3 winners and a couple of placings from his 6 picks, Craig has let me know that he needs a spell after being up for the best part of 12 months, 9 of which have been winless, so on that note it’ll be Crazy Colin to fill his shoes for the next couple of weeks from next Saturday through to the end of July….

So on that note, it’s time for one last rendition of Cliff Richard’s version of Lucky Lips!

Pick of the Day: Uncommon James (No.10, Barrier 2) in Race 2 at Eagle Farm (BR2), 12:18pm AEST

1200m BM78 Impressu Print Group Handicap

Trainers: Steven O’Dea & Matt Hoysted, Jockey: Ben Thompson, 56.5kg

Hello hello everyone it’s Craaaazy Craig TBFB, Scratchie King of Bairnsdale, and can I just start this week’s drivel by pointing out that I PICKED A VALUE WINNER LAST WEEK, SO YOU CAN ALL FORM A LINE TO KISS MY ARSE!

Anyway, while you’re getting your lips out, I’ve got one last crack at finding a couple of winners before I have a bit of time off donating scratchies to the less fortunate, because let’s face it knackers, most people can’t stand the thought of having to put up with me for 5 minutes, let alone 24/7 – How do you think Colin became Crazy Colin!

So that said, I’m going straight back to Queensland & Eagle Farm for the Tatts Tiara meeting, but I won’t be going to the main race to find the pick of the day, I’ll be going to early on in the card, where I’ve seen Uncommon James running 1st Up in a bloody BENCHMARK 78 after heading home current Tiara favourite Annavisto in a trial, and you know something knackers…

You know who was an uncommon James?

JAMES BROWN, THE GODFATHER OF SOUL!

So I guess you can say I FEEEEEEEEEEEEEL GOOD about Uncommon James, because his first prep as a 2-year-old last year left you wanting more, as he ran a narrow 2nd on debut at the Gold Coast, then won his maiden by 3 lengths, then rounded it off by winning the Listed Oxlade, and after that he went for a long spell, which is exactly where I’m headed.

Now, as previously mentioned, he’s had 2 rev-up trials before he hits this race 1st Up, there’s other horses in the race who I won’t bother mentioning because they’re probably crap, and of course, backing a 3-year-old 1st Up after a year in the paddock throws up so many red flags you’d think it was May Day in Red Square circa 1962, but knackers, you why I’m called CRAZY CRAIG?

BECAUSE I’M CRAZY, AND I DON’T CARE ABOUT BULLSHIT LIKE THAT!

So there you go, UNCOMMON JAMES is my Pick of the Day.

Value Pick: Fifth Position (No.8, Barrier 13) E/W in Race 5 at Caulfield (MR5), 2:10pm AEST

1600m Neds BM78 Handicap

Trainers: Mick Price & Mick Kent Jnr, Jockey: Pat Moloney, 59kg

Knackers, I remember reading in the Bible that the Lord said unto John, come forth and receive eternal life….

But John finished fifth and, he’s obviously had a horse named after him.

The ‘Stretching very hard to Get a Random Robbie Williams Pick’: Angelic Miss (No.5, Barrier 8) E/W in Race 9 at Belmont (PR9), 4:50pm AWST

1200m 78+ Rating TabTouch Better Your Bet Handicap

Trainer: Simon Miller, Jockey: Chris Parnham, 57kg

And through it all
She offers me protection
A lot of love and affection
Whether I’m right or wrong!
And down the waterfall
Wherever it may take me
I know that life won’t break me
When I come to call!

She won’t forsake me…
I’M LOVIN’ ANGELIC MISS INSTEAD!

Enjoy your Saturday folks, stay safe, stay negative, KEEP YOUR EYES ON THE ROAD, and remember, I’m Crazy Craig, and that’s why they call me Craaaaaazy Craig!