Based on a series of plausible events in a regional Victorian town

So here we are folks, the first weekend of March, exactly one year since Shane Keith Warne left us, it’s too damn humid, and things are finally starting to hit overdrive with Group 1s galore, and this Saturday it’s the Australian Guineas meeting at Flemington, plus what used to be the Canterbury Guineas/Stakes meeting, which for many years now has been the Randwick Guineas at ‘Wandwick’, plus a bunch of other Group 2s around the place, like the Blamey at Flemington, the Challenge Stakes, the Todman and the Reisling Stakes at Randwick for the 2-year-olds…

Hang on, Reisling Stakes, why did they name a race after a wine?

If that’s the case, I expect to see the Sauvignon Blanc Stakes and the Chardonnay Stakes on Slipper Day at Rosehill.

Another highlight on the day will be the Hawkesbury Provincial Championship qualifier, not that I’ll be looking at any form for it, because my dear former neighbour Tim ‘The Toolman’ Walker is getting married today, and let’s just say in racing terms, everyone attending is 3rd Up and ready to absolutely let rip down the outside in the straight.

So it’s on to Crazy Craig, and we may have seen more definitive proof that Crazy Craig is one of the unluckiest mugs in Australia, as last week his Pick of the Day (In Secret) ran 3rd, beaten a split lip in a 4-way finish in the Surround Stakes, and his Value Picks run 3rd and 2nd, so in that sense, at least our resident lunatic had 2 collects last Saturday…

Which means he’s not totally crap!

Hello hello everyone it’s Crazy Crazy Crazy Craig, TBFB, Scratchie King of Bairnsdale, and once again my letterbox was flooded with complaints after In Secret was beaten last Saturday, but these people sending letters are bunch of pissy little Negative Nancys who only back horses for wins!

If you’d backed both by Value picks for a place, you’d have doubled your money twice over!

Wait a minute, that means you’d have made 4-times your money if you weren’t so stupid!

Anyway, here we go for this week’s P(r)icks of the Day, who invariably will find more ways to lose than Australia did in the first 2 Tests, so bloody hell you useless nags, THROW ME A FREAKIN’ BONE HERE!

P(r)ick No.1: Economics (No.3, Barrier 11) in Race 5 at Randwick (SR5), 2:40pm AEDT

1100m Listed Tokyo City Keiba Fireball Stakes

Trainer: Annabel Neasham, Jockey: James McDonald, 58kg

Starting off the top, and it’s appropriate I include a song related to finance and money, because Wednesday marked 50 years since the release of Pink Floyd’s record-breaking Dark Side of the Moon (972 weeks on the Billboard 200 charts!), and what was the lead single off Dark Side of the Moon?

MONEY!

My Pick of the Day, and certainly not my choice of Degree, is Economics!

Great to see a horse named after something I have no understanding of, competing in a sport that I have no understanding of!

P(r)ick No.2: Queen Air (No.10, Barrier 2) E/W in Race 5 at Flemington (MR5), 3pm AEDT

1600m BM84 The Schweppes Plate

Trainer: Lindsey Smith, Jockey: Jarrod Fry, 54.5kg

I think we’re getting good odds on Queen Air in the fifth at Flemington, considering it was only a poor jump in the Vanity a few weeks ago that cost her a shot at being in the finish, as evidenced by her good finishing furlong, and now she comes into this 3rd Up and ready to really give the mile a good spanking.

In fact, down the side of the course, I reckon they should be playing Phil Collins…

I can feel it, coming in the Queen Air tonight, oh, lord!
And I’ve been waiting for this moment, for all my life, oh, lord!
Can you feel it, coming in the air tonight, oh, lord, oh, lord!

P(r)ick No.3: Thorogood (No.2, Barrier 3) E/W in Race 8 at Ascot (PR8), 4:56pm AWST

1600m Graduation 60+ Handicap

Trainer: David Harrison, Jockey: Brandon Louis (a2), 59.5kg

He won two races at Belmont during January, he then placed in both runs during January, and with a name like Thorogood, you’d better hope he’s BAD TO THE BONE!

This was David Harrison’s comment about Thorogood’s chances:

“I make a rich woman beg, I’ll make a good woman steal”
“I’ll make an old woman blush, and make a young girl squeal”
“I wanna be yours pretty baby, yours and yours alone!”
“I’m here to tell ya honey, that I’m BAD TO THE BONE!“

Crazy Craig’s Group 1 advice for the Australian Guineas, the Randwick Guineas and the Canterbury Stakes, courtesy of Gary Harley: “Back the favourite, because the favourite is the favourite for a reason!”

Enjoy your weekend folks, stay safe, stay negative, KEEP YOUR EYES ON THE ROAD, and remember, I’m Crazy Craig, and that’s why they call me Craaaaaazy Craig!