Based on a series of plausible events in a regional Victorian town

Who can believe it…. 2 picks for 2 winners on the 4th of July – Goes to show you can’t go wrong playing Charley Pride on any day, let alone Independence Day.

Anyway, because it seemingly worked for the madman last week, here’s Willie Nelson again!

The Eiffel 65 Pick: Lugh (No.2, Barrier 10) in Race 9 at Randwick (SR9), 4pm AEST

1400m BM88 Toyota Forklifts Handicap

Trainer: Ciaron Maher, Jockey: Siena Grima (a2), 61kg

Hello hello everybody it’s Crazy Craig, TBFB, Scratchie King of Bairnsdale, and my pants are FULL TO THE BRIM with cash after that performance last Saturday, and let me assure you the mothers with prams in Bairnsdale are going to be thrilled when they see pineapples with David Unaipon’s face on the footpath, because humanity can only get BETTER with kindness like that!

Anyway, I’ve only got one pick this week because quite honestly July racing is an enormous borefest, so I’ve lined up something at Randwick that sounded like something that Eiffel 65 sang about late in the 1990s, a few years after Clan O’Sullivan stank it up in the Golden Slipper…

Yo, listen up here’s a story
About a little guy that lives in a LUGH world
And all day and all night and everything he sees is just blue
Like him, inside and outside

LUGH his house with a LUGH little window
And a LUGH Corvette and everything is LUGH for him
And himself and everybody around
‘Cause he ain’t got nobody to listen…

I’m LUGH, da-ba-dee-da-ba-di!
Da-ba-dee-da-ba-di, da-ba-dee-da-ba-di!
Da-ba-dee-da-ba-di, da-ba-dee-da-ba-di!
Da-ba-dee-da-ba-di, da-ba-dee-da-ba-di!

Enjoy your weekend folks, stay safe, stay negative, KEEP YOUR EYES ON THE ROAD FOR ANOTHER WEEK OF THE SCHOOL HOLIDAYS, and remember, I’m Crazy Craig, and that’s why they call me Craaaaaazy Craig!