Horse Racing

The Chalk Eaters Guide Review: 1st February

Trevelyan travelling superbly at Eagle Farm

I can’t tell who put in a more stinky performance.

High Bridge, Trevelyan, or the Melbourne Stars.

Quite a strange day really – The heavy rain in Melbourne killed off the hopes of many other favourites not named High Bridge, there were shorties getting up at Randwick until they weren’t, Newcastle got called off due to extreme heat, and Kyneton at one point resembled the opening 10 minutes of Waterworld.

High Bridge in Race 3 at Caulfield – 6th (Second Last)

Now that is just frikkin’ hilarious.

A British horse that can’t go a yard on a Soft track – I think that’s grounds for an instant dismissal, although I suspect Mr Waller now has the perfect excuse to dump him out into the paddock.

Got way too far back against a slow speed, and in the driving rain, was drowned by Vaucluse Bay.

Trevelyan in Race 3 at Eagle Farm – Hahahahahahahahhaha, last.

Let’s check up on old Alec:

Crikey, $1.40, and all we got was a run so bad I can’t even show the replay so that you don’t vomit in disgust.

Subpoenaed in Race 5 at Randwick – WINNER

Apparently a horse that has performed admirably in Group races is a bit too good for a Benchmark 70.

Who’d a thunk it.

Anyway, look at me, gloating over finding a $1.60 winner for you.

Then again, that’s what makes the Chalk Eaters, the Chalk Eaters.

Inspirational Girl in Race 7 at Ascot – WINNER

Yep, it was all this guy.

Turns out sticking to the rail was an absolute piece of piss – For some reason everyone wanted to stay off it, which allowed him to maintain momentum and cut down Patristic with a well-timed run.

Any other rider and I’d be ranting and raving about how great the ride was, but it’s The Wizard, so it’s just “Yeah, and?”.

Crazy Craig’s Tip Of The Day

LAYING Night Of Power in Race 4 at Randwick – SUCCESSFUL

It was a driving finish, and you could tell early into the straight that Night Of Power probably wasn’t going to be in it (Even though he battled on for 4th), as Insensata and Mongolian Wolf were joined by the favourite Romani Girl, who used her gypsy powers to win in a gripping finish.

Anyway, well done Crazy Craig, on showing extreme bravery taking on a 2nd favourite.

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