Horse Racing

The Chalk Eaters Guide Review: 14th September

If an Idiot Tax was ever introduced, there would be jockeys filing for bankruptcy on a daily basis.

Followed by me, but that has nothing to do with an Idiot Tax.


King of Leogrance in Race 1 at Flemington- 4th

What the hell went through Olly’s head.

The King drew Barrier 6, he was comfortable one off the fence as the field headed towards the back straight, and yet for some reason, he decided to go for the fence in a smartarse move to save ground.

Predictably, he was then caught behind the tiring camels in the straight, and the good people of Australia that had climbed aboard could only recoil in horror as The King never saw daylight until it was too late.

That’s not unlucky, that’s stupidity that could have easily been prevented.

The start of an utterly appalling day of riding around the nation.

Amazing that the Williams family still have any association with Oliver, given the stupid crap he’s done this decade.


Mystic Journey in Race 7 at Flemington (G1 Makybe Diva)- 2nd

I can’t decide on the current leader for the greatest fraud committed by a Tasmanian.

Tim Paine claiming to be a captain, or Mystic Journey claiming to be Australia’s best horse.

I also feel quite comfortable in saying Gatting winning is the most sickening thing I’ve seen on a racetrack since Prince of Penzance won the Melbourne Cup.

GATTING RAN DEAD FRIKKIN’ LAST IN THE IDYLLIC PRINCE OVER HERE AGAINST OUR PACK OF CAMELS.

FOR GOODNESS SAKE, GREAT AGAIN GAVE HIM WINDBURN.

AND THEN HE GOES TO BLOODY FLEMINGTON AND SOMEHOW WHACKS A FIELD FULL OF GROUP ONE WINNERS AT 100/1.

It should never ever happen, and yet it does.

Get stuffed McAuliffe, you fat bastard.

Every bloody time I back one of his plodders at Belmont, they somehow get rolled, and now he goes and does this.

I’ve only got once conclusion from this utter shitshow… The European raiders are going to utterly destroy our WFA ranks with next to no fuss next month.

Renowned big mouth Matt Chapman got bagged for questioning the quality of Winx’s opposition…. So far his words are holding up like St Paul’s in The Blitz.


Demerara in Race 8 at Flemington (G2 Bobbie Lewis) – 6th

Will never win at group level.


God Of Thunder in Race 9 at Rosehill- 3rd

If you popped the word ‘Avdulla’ into the old Google Translate, you should get a rough definition of “Peanut brain”.

It’s one thing to go back on a track with a massive leaders bias.

IT’S ANOTHER TO GET TRAPPED 3 WIDE AS WELL.

That’s harder to achieve than actually riding a winner.

After covering 2000m in an 1100m event, he somehow still ran on for 3rd in a display of talent, getting beaten by the roughie Spanish Dream, one of the seemingly dozens of Spanish horses going around today.

You bet your arse I’m angry- It was one of the worst rides all bloody year.

Somehow Brenton will dodge a holiday for that shitsack of a ride, because most of the stewards in this country are invertebrates and simply just let stuff like this through to the kepper.

Crikey, what a crap day.


Crazy Craig’s Tip Of The Day


LAYING Castlevecchio in Race 5 at Rosehill- SUCCESSFUL

The track bias did the job in bringing down a 2YO Group One winner in Castlevecchio, who did drift out past $5 by the jump, but for a 1st Up run, he did show that 1500m is seemingly well short of his best distance.

At the 300, I figured Castlevecchio was going to run last, being hard ridden by Ford (Ironic) as early as the halfway mark, but he let down beautifully against the bias and finished 4th down the outside.

Still, it was a return to form for Crazy Craig, and I got a message saying he was off to the Bowls Club with Crazy Colin to celebrate, for the simple reason being that it’s the only establishment in Bairnsdale that Colin hasn’t been banned from.


TWO WORDS- HORROR SHOW.

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