Apologies everyone for the delay, I’m recovering from the heart palpitations I had when I found out Judith Durham’s carnival was over, which were then exacerbated by watching Kristina Krstic from our beloved Manning Bowling Club play in the Women’s Pairs Gold Medal match at the Birmingham Commonwealth Games…. After being 2-11 down after 6 of the 18 ends, it came down to the last bowl of an extra end after an 18-18 draw, and her partner Ellen Ryan had to play a very difficult shot to knock the English holder away, and she absolutely nailed it…

My only regret right now is that I couldn’t be at Manning to witness the scenes when that drive made contact, or Ellen’s club of Cabramatta for that ‘matta’, because they’ve probably blown the roof off the joint.

And by the way Fox Sports, it’s a BOWL, not a ball, you meatheads.

Now for your feature presentation:

The first major massacre of the new punting year… Hard Empire at 100/1 in the Missile Stakes:

If Hard Empire winning at triple figures wasn’t enough, Meg then won the last at $56 and made the Randwick Quaddie pay a lazy $169,638.80….

And of course, Meg reminds me of this classic Family Guy moment.

Shut Up, Meg.

So on the whole, due to having to hop on a plane to Sydney I only backed one horse, which just happened to be Lord Ardmore in Race 7 at Randwick, and luckily I got on him at $2.75 before we had to board, and as luck would have it, the plane was half an hour early to Sydney thanks to a solid tailwind, and by sheer coincidence the happened to land right as the race jumped, and I got to witness the classic Waller/Bowman delivering for the entire nation that had backed his Lordship.

As for Crazy Craig, I would describe his return to punting as extremely sound, given his Value Pick in Soffika made a solid charge to the line to grab 3rd in a 3-way finish some 2 lengths behind the Randwick Race 9 quinella pairing of Casino Kid and Contributingfactor, while Fire wasn’t quite the Pick of the Day that was promised, as he became a bit wayward in the straight and was mown down by nearest rival Chain of Lightning…

But that Value Pick paid a healthy $3.10 the place, which is a collect and a case of LUCKY LIPS!

Value Pick: Soffika E/W in Race 9 at Randwick = 3rd ($3.10p)

I’ll be honest, I flicked the stream off halfway through when I saw Soffika being given windburn by Casino Kid, after which I convinced myself that she was going to finish midfield, then I look back 5 minutes later and I saw she’d run 3rd…

I can only think Tim Clark was being willed on by Crazy Craig in spirit, because goodness gracious, she never looked like running a place until she did!

Pick of the Day: Fire in Race 9 at Flemington = 2nd ($1.24p)

Isn’t it funny how Crazy Craig describes the rivals of his picks as having hearts as big as peas, then they all invariably end up giving him and his selection a metaphorical punch to the gonads.

Honestly though, Fire raced like he was walking out of Crown Casino at 4am….

I can only summise that the Madri Gras would be straighter than his last 100 metres.